Had someone who said they didn't want to talk to me, that I was to draining. So to respect their wishes I took them off of my google+ thing. Had to look up how to do that and how to remove someone from your address book in your Gmail. I also deleted the bookmark to the Spiritual forum I went to since they post there. I had a thread I posted to there simultaneous to when I posted to this Google+ post blog thing, but that is ok. if they want no contact with me and I do drain them maybe I'd drain them by going to the same forum they go to. I don't know how these things work. I don't even pretend to know how these things work.
As far as I know the light body stuff I have been doing has not done any good. I do hope this Gateway Experience or whatever Robert Monroe and his institute name it will work. Been less then a week and I'm not done with doing the 1st audio of wave 1. I won't switch to the 2nd audio of wave 2 till Friday, since last Friday was when I started doing the 1st audio of wave 1. I figure I won't have any idea if it is doing anything for me or not till maybe January.
Found out the livestream I was going to watch tonight isn't happening. Oh well, I was looking forward to that, guess it as a last minute cancellation thing, the host getting sick, to tired from work or something to do a stream and the others are not prepared to do a stream. As I see it it's likely for my greater good. I'll buy another hemi-sync, taking the money from the kindle book fund I had put aside. I can try out one of the meditation ones. Though since it's a Mind Food one I guess it may take a month at least to notice if that one does any good or not.
I got up from trying to take a nap but didn't get to sleep even listening to the hemi-sync Dreamcatcher. Felt it doing a lot of energy stuff, no idea how and can't begin to describe how it feels. i thought for sure I'd go to sleep since by my records I've only slept about 5.5 hours. maybe that's enough or maybe I was wrong on the time and I've slept 6.5 hours and that is enough for today. Or maybe this body will do extra sleep tomorrow. it's possible. I'm not feeling 100%, but part of that is a mild headache, from the time I went out in the sun earlier today. forgot to take an aspirin. Whenever I do that i always get what I call a sun headache. I've taken an asprin not to long ago though so maybe it'll go away in an hour or so.
Once I listen to this hemi-sync meditation I'll then watch a Brice Lee movie. Those are next up on my movie series I've seen in my childhood and have not seen for years, so not a total loss. I do wonder if Gateway and Hemi-sync will do any good since the Light Body courses I did didn't do any good. not that I'm mad at spending the money I could only barely afford to spend, taking all my spending money for those months. if I had not gotten them and tried them out then I'd have no knowledge that they won't work for me. Which I do know so that money was spend in gaining me that experience. As for the Gateway and the Hemi-sync courses i bought yesterday and today, I'll have to wait and see. The Dreamcather seems to have worked a bit, but that may be premature since I've had it only 24 hours. I may buy a 3rd Hemi-sync music one and thereby have 2 hemi-sync music audios and hemi-sync with 2 guided meditations, a 1 hour one and a abridged 20something minute one. so 3 in total, not counting the Gateway ones. I'm sure by January I'll know if this is doing any good or if they don't work for me.
This means I have no one to talk to about this stuff, but that's ok. I've gone full circle. I started off and spend most of my life with no one to talk to about this stuff and I'm right back to having no one to talk to about this stuff so actually it's right back to normal. I do wonder if there is life after death if I'll spend that alone too and needing to be alone a lot due to being to drained being around people and picking up stuff. I would assume so. Likely a mark for a very young soul, but I don't really care about soul ages so I'll give that no further thought.
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I did the nearly hour long hemi-sync meditation. not sure if it worked or not. I felt something diffidently in the various spots of my body. may have given myself a headache, but then again that could be the left over from the sun headache earlier. I think I should put an aspirin on top of my id stuff since I'll try to go to the grocery store again tomorrow. it as raining Sunday. Today was a dud, in that the bus never arrived. That happens at times. I do hope it comes tomorrow. All I need is 1 more trip and I'll be done for a month.
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Tried watching a video on soul contracts, figured since I know nothing about this spiritual stuff I could learn some stuff but like a video I tried to watch yesterday I think it was, different person, the host's audio was either to low or he naturally speaks very softly and everyone else is to loud compared to him so I quit after a few minutes. Oh well. Guess that happens with folks at times, having the varying audio levels.
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Think I may be in a cycle where I'm extra sensative to sound. Maybe light too, not sure. I noticed stretching way back a decade or more, before I started to take Ginko for my migranes, even though I'm already sensative to light and sound. There were times when I was extra sensative to one or both sound and light. At times it was severe, not to mention my migranes. Since I've been taking Ginko not only are my migranes gone where now I get just regular headaches, or maybe it's that my migranes feel like regular headaches. But the cycles when I'm sensative to light and or sound are not a severe as they were before. I wonder what the cause is. No biggie. I've lived this long not knowing, just like I've lived this long having the list of foods I can shrink the older I get with no idea why. I can live the rest of my 50 to 100 years having no idea why. Just have to adapt as best as I can. no biggie in eiher way.
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I do feel different from my mediation, no idea how to describe it, no biggie. I think I may need to do that long one, the nearly 1 hour, every day for a week or a month before I can start doing the short one that is for quick balance and adjustment. Just a guess since this meditation is of the mind food type of hemi-sync i guess that means it takes at least a month to take effect.
Again I do hope the Gateway hemi-sync thing works, but that'll take time. As I said I should know by January I' guess and hope.
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Just wanted to add, for the past maybe hour, not sure when, I've felt really odd. No idea if it is positive, neutral, negative or a mix of those. part of it is some sort of pressure and slight discomfort in my head. and the rest of me feels really weird, can't describe how. I assume its a temporary thing that'lll pass sooner or later. Wonder what it means or what the cause is. I'm sure it'll pass sooner or later.
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