Sunday, May 31, 2015

2 very short (? DIVINE SELF ?) [5-31]

I had a short encounter with my divine self, or a part of it.  at first I asked my divine self, or a fragment of it.  It felt like me,but way more energy and much more concentration of energy.  I asked it to first channel energy into my emotional and mental bodies .  Then I asked it a few questions. 

Any tips for me?  <Remove and deal with fear, that is the main thing many have, though they may not be aware of it.  You are becoming more like me every day, your true self you may say.  Continue your good work. After fear, doubt it something you should work on too.  You do not have much fear, which is why I'd prefer you to work on that first.  The bits left may be buried and .... up to you of course but I'd rather you get rid of that before doubt.  Work on it daily, several times a day in a relaxed and fun manner.> 

Sunday [5-31]

I did the Opening to Your True Identity longer free meditation, had quite a few things happen during it.  During the early part where Orin was talking and before the meditation itself started I did a quick running the energies and did pretty well.  The one I had the most trouble with was the 6th light body energy center, not to surprised there.  Now as I type this I can feel, I guess, my unicorn horn a bit.  and like before, it's connected to my Pieah, the 6th light body energy center. 

The meditation itself went well.  I did feel myself opening up, some elements being transmuted, to higher light, vibration, whatever the term is. I could feel and see it. 

During part of it I felt a naga, she felt herm but a slight leaning towards female, come and coil around me and I was in a naga form, including both of us having a hood type thing like cobras have.  She put her left cheek to mine and was coiled around me and we started to sway side to side as she started doing some sort of humming or vibration that I found very relaxing and could feel some of it in my body.  I was able to do the meditation at the same time.  After a bit she stopped us swaying and then the humming vibration thing and she then left.

I asked her if she was a guide and I got a reply with a mental sort of smile <and more.> 

I asked what were you doing I got, <activating your naga dna, at the soul level and maybe physical>.. again with a bit of a mental smile
A bit later I saw a mental image (at the same time as the visualization of the guided meditation)  of myself in a naga form, with a cobra like hood, and a reptilian type naga.  I was with some what looked like dino raptor types, either like velociraptor or deinoychus type.  I looked at my hand and saw i was a clawed reptilian type hand, but I was glowing like I was made of light and a sorta mental voice said <you'll be a guide to them.>  I felt at some point in the future, after some interval maybe.

Over all an interesting experience I think.

--------------------------------------------------

I did do the 12th mediation for part 4 again.  The meditation went well overall.   Hard to recall all of it since it is almost 40 minutes long.  I did see the temple of the masters.  The 3 that appeared, were interesting.  2 of them seemed to be 2 of my soul parents, my unicorn mother and dragon mother as well, my dragon mother was in a naga form, one of the types that she is.  The other one was also a naga.  Though it did seem like this third figure had 2 forms in one, a dolphin like being and naga.  I switched to see and the 3rd being would take the other form.  So if I was a naga it would be a dolphin, and vice versa.  For most of the event thing I stayed in a dolphin like being form.   then my soul was in a dolphin size orca form and when we merged I wound up at first like a dolphin like being with orca colors.  Then later on a blending of the 2 forms. 

Thw work on my emotional and mental bodies went very well I thought.  For part of it I went very deep into my trance indeed.  The latter part of it I was really just relaxing and trying to go through the visualization.  I take that to mean some work was done while I was very deep.  I do remember what happened, but it's hard to put into words what happened.  Energy exchange, merging with the part of me not incarnated, some with the divine self's energy, my energy being risen in octaves, a higher vibration, transmuted to a finer light energy.  hard to describe my experience. 

I also, during part of it got a flash of the Sasha raptor that appeared with a either knowledge or words saying she would be a future student of mine, with me being a guide or teacher of hers. 

Overall I do feel better.  But hard to describe how and in what ways.

-----------------------------------------

I assume if I will be a guide I'd be more like an assistant guide, unless I already have been one. 

I did the first of the short free meditations of the body section.  The first one is called cellular activation.  From the meditation it seems to be you have your soul, or in my case me, the part of me not incarnated here, come to you and you can feel it is love.  Then you have it gather solar light, whatever that is.  I just imagined my divine self as a bright sun and the light was coming from that.  I could feel the higher finer light energy filling the part of me not incarnated, that was around me, & then sending it into my body's cells till they were filled with this light energy, filled till they could hold no more.  Not sure if it did any cellular activation or had any effect.  It may be I may not notice the effects for a while.  But it was an ok to enjoyable 4 or so minutes.

-------------------------

I did the 2nd one in the body short free meditations.  it was almost 5 minutes but felt like it was at most 1 minute.  It was an ok experience, streaming in a golden light from above into the solar plexas area, up the spine out the top of the head.  I had it go back to form a complete circuit.    it was an ok to maybe interesting.  I do feel a bit more energy. Maybe extra energy in my abdominal area. 

-------------------------

This last one was about relaxation.  An interesting mediation that was also about 4 minutes but felt like it was at most 1 minute.  I could feel the breathing in of light and energy I had scattered into the universe, and breathing out negative emotions and energy from my physical, etheric, emotional and mental bodies.  The meditation didn't mention the bodies but I added in that part myself.

------------------------------------

I had a brief conversation with Maribelle before I went to sleep while I lay down to take a nap.  She did something that helped me to go to sleep faily quickly.

She and Spitfire had been friends for quite a while. 

Before that she said that she had picked me to be Spitfire's first not in the hopes that she & I would become mates.  That was not her intention.  but Spitfire is younger then her and was curious about sharing and sex so Maribelle suggested me, since she thought and told Spitfire that her first should be someone patient and experienced and not some younger type who may be to eager or excitable.  And Spitfire and I do have some things in common so we could spend time together  talking about and doing stuff apart from sharing & sex.  Though it was not her itension Maribelle is not sorry we Spitfire and I became mates. 

-------------------------

I also awoke, or a bit after I awoke I realized I had more.  A bit vague, but like usual it's like it's always been there.  something to do with Some Ananaki (not sure of the spelling) being sorry or something like that, about what they did and want to try to fix what they did or try to make amends, or something.  Something to do with what they did to humans sometime in the past, but no real details but that. no idea what that is about, no biggie I guess.

----------------------------

I did the awaken the solar light body meditation I had come across on youtube a long time ago, not sure when. It went ok.  I could feel some energy going through me at times, some sort of higher fine light type energy.  Not a lot to report on this except what I already said.

-------------------------

I did the now, a meditation journey to your inner self and beyond.  It was sorta meh.  it was interesting in spots.  I could feel the energy of the body, but not the external energy the person talked about.  Nor being one with the universe.  Though unlike what he said I do know the true me, the inner me that some call soul, that really is me, just most of it is not incarnated in this body. 

-------------------------------------------

I seem to have a bit of access to a bit more of my soul knowledge.  I know I have had lives and are from Sirius, quite a few maybe, or maybe early on.  Not sure of the details.  I feel I've had lives on Pleiades, wherever that planet is with anthro dolphins.  Wherever nagas are.  Those are ones I recall.  Or like the soul knowledge that I have had connections to Sirius and Pleiades, not sure of others besides like I said that I recall like anthro dolphins, naga.  1 that I recall that are a furred humanoid, no idea about them, just a bit of a past life I had a memory of that I typed up a day or a few days ago.  I'm not sure about those.   

-----------------------------------------

1 (Sasha - Raptor) [5-31]


I had just awoken when I had a brief mental visit from someone new.  I'll do my best to recreate the mental conversation.  I had been watching some channeling videos while I ate a bit before my nap. 

I felt a sort of contact, sorta like a mental light tap of one finger like to get one's attention, hard to describe.

"Hello?": <I just came by to say a brief hello.>   I felt this was a reptilian, I got a sorta mental image of a dinosaur type raptor, and the feeling she was a warm loving being.

"Surprised that you would approach and talk to a human." I mentioned this for a few reasons. First while I don' see myself as human and inhabiting a human body some others may see me as human even at the soul level, and to see what she'd say.  <I can see looking at your soul that you are not human... I can see also that you have a naga heritage.  They helped us in the past to ascend to what you may refer to from the 3rd to the 4th density.  Some of us, at the time, choose to not ascend, some did, many choose not to.  so now our numbers are few.  We do honor and appreciate the naga for their help and I wish to thank you for that.  perhaps in a past incarnation you were one of them.>

"Perhaps, or one of my soul mothers.  She may have been one of the ones or perhaps one of her aspects.  So you are a sentient Velociraptor or Deinonychus? <I do believe humans have classified some of our ancestors as that yes.  There were some, visitors to earth during the age of dinosaurs who looked over and saw a promising species and, did some what you may call gene  splicing or gene altering to nudge one of the species towards becoming sentient, teaching some culture later on a later visit.  then some naga, helped by teaching those of us who were ready about ascending to the 4th density.  We have much to think the nagas for.>

"So you and the nagas are a species of the light? <I do believe treb bor yit ne classifies us and the nagas as a type 1, if I do recall his numbering system correctly.>


"Ah, so you heard of treb?"  I've never talk to Treb just seen some videos and read his 1st book.  <Yes, he is in contact with some of us.

"And how about the nagas? <Some of them do at times now and then, at certain .... intervals.  Wishing us to grow and progress on our own without their interference.  Though some do wish they'd contact us more often since we can learn so much from them.  We do understand why.>

"I felt the name Sasha, that is a human name. <yes, I adopt a human name.  Easier then using my real name, when talking to humans, or those of human incarnations.>  Here the contact was ended.  Guess it was meant to be a short visit, or short mental communication. 

Here the contact was ended.  Guess it was meant to be a short visit, or short mental communication.  Not sure what to make of this.  I just put it here since I guess it would be channeled, though I didn't initiate it.  I guess if someone else wishes to talk to me mentally it could be called channeling? Not sure of the classification, or if it was just a conversation and not a channeling proper.

Saturday, May 30, 2015

Saturday [5-30]

I do wonder if my past was at least a bit altered, since assuming what I got is correct, I think they said something about the quantum fields were adjusted when I was recreated.  So that could have changed the past or just started a new timeline.  So maybe before Spitfire and I were not lovers since I was just a dolphin type being.  Maribelle and I may have been maybe just friends, maybe occasional lovers, not sure about that. 

Since I was re-created perhaps Maribelle considered me a possible first mate since part of my soul heritage included being a unicorn, whereas perhaps in the first timeline she may have either not asked, or perhaps asked me after she had a unicorn mate first. 

Spitfire and I may have been just friends or maybe just acquaintances, but in the altered timeline, being a unicorn, among other things I've said, I became a possible mate.  I Was her first perhaps since, as I think my soul memories revealed, she was a bit shy especially in that area, she was good friends and Maribelle may have suggested me since I'm older and wouldn't be over eager, but could take my time.  And she and I became lovers maybe, and later she asked if we could be mates.  maybe she had time to think things over since I was incarnated here.  Not sure if time is passing the same there as here, or if the part of me that's not incarnated here visits and spends time with her and she came to me since that part of me was willing and she came to ask this part of me since part of me is incarnated here and part is not incarnated.

------------------------------

Had a conversation with Spitfire since I could feel sexual desire and urges not just within myself but coming from external and it did feel like it was coming from 3, Spitfire the most, some from Maribelle and my Twin Flame.  Spitfire said it was because she prefers to be monogamous, but understands that's not my way, I'm the focus of her sexual urges and desires.  With Maribelle she has lovers and one day may have mates so though Maribelle and I have special places in each other's hearts since we are mates, her lovers can satisfy her to an extent.  I guess she means for Maribelle her sexual desires and urges have multiple focuses and Twin Flame's does, though Twin Flame and I share a special relationship obviously.  Though I'll get all of Spitfire's since I'm the sole focus.  Makes sense. 

That may make for interesting times once I'm back home fully.  I did ask Spitfire how about her and Maribelle, I'd not mind if the 2 of them want to have some fun. Spitfire said she may be interested if I'd be present to watch.  I mentioned I may like that, but after a bit I may want to join in and participate, which I got the feeling Spitfire would really like. 

I did ask Spitfire if the part of me that is not incarnated is capable of satisfying her since I can't be there fully and she said it isn't the same since I'm not fully there.  part of me is there, where I am, incarnated in this body.  I think I do understand.  Her mate is in 2 places so  perhaps 2 focuses, if that makes sense.  It does to me.

---------------------------

I think I'll do the soul linking meditation.  it's only 15 minutes and one of the free ones, and the shortest of the long meditations.  I think I'll try it with Spitfire first to see what happens.  Then later on today maybe Maribelle & Twin Flame later.  I think starting Sunday I'll do 1 free longer meditation and 1 category of the short free meditations (those tend to have 2-5 meditations that are 2-4 minutes long each.  If I do this, on Thursday I'll be doing the last ones and Friday I can start on part 5 of the awaken the light body. 

I may also go back to the 7th meditation of part 4 at some point , seeing a relationship as energy, to see what i get if I try it with Spitfire, Maribelle, then Twin Flame.  Hmm.

--------------------

I did the soul linking.  The first thing Orin had me do is bring my soul in as a ball.  It's color was a very dark blue, almost black. Then for the soul linking I choose Spitfire. I felt we had a strong connection already at my light body heart energy center.  I did feel some slight very slight pains there, as blocks maybe or something.   Though I did feel we had a strong connection and our love was a bit intense, even with all the sexualness not being present.  And our love as deep perhaps.  With the solar light she had in the meditation too, I used that to dissolve most of the blocks or whatever was causing the faint pain, till it was basically just a faint bit left.

Then she had us bring in a 2nd person.  I choose Maribelle. I felt our connection to be as strong as Spitfire, but our love was very gentle, or had a very gentle feel to it, hard to describe.  i felt like it was deep as well.  at the end I added in Twin Flame though she was saying for me to return.  I felt with Twin flame, as I expected, our connection and love went very deep and was more intense then Maribelle's, but more gentle and the level of intensity was more gentle then Spitfire and our love.

------------------------------------------------

I awoke feeling more tired then when I went to bed to take a nap. Though I got up anyway.

I tried the short free meditation Receiving Solar Light. It seemed like I could indeed see the solar light above me, shining down. It's the source of some sort of very high light energy with some love mixed in. Hard to describe what it feels like. The shining light did cause me to be able to feel my unicorn horn, and, like yesterday when I did a meditation, forgot which one, that my horn is connected to my 6th light body energy center at the center of my head. Anyway the meditation included breathing in the solar light. I added in that as I exhaled it went to the various parts of my bodies, light, mental, emotional, etheric & physical bodies, and I added in any others I may not know of yet, as well as seeing the solar light shining a path to my highest path for today which I walked in. I do feel much lighter, like I am filled with some higher light energy stuff. hard to describe how it feels, and like I am radiating this light too.

---------------------------

Next I did the very short free Shower of Light Meditation. It was interesting. This mediation was about 4 minutes, but it felt like it was at most 1 minute. This was about a shower of light, different colors of light of rainbow colors. I could feel the different colors as they were like a shower of color on me and as I breathed them in. Each felt slightly different then the one before. A very pleasant 

----------------------------------------------

I was talking to Scarlett and after she went to bed I was thinking and an idea popped into my head and some sort of soul knowledge popped into my head. 

It seems one can have 1 of 2 types of twin flames, or one may have 2 or more twin flames.   One I'll call the monad twin flame since the split may happen at the monad level.  Though also a split can happen, or a 2nd one may happen, more at what some would call the soul level. So one may have 2 twin flames, what I call a monad twin flame and a soul twin flame.  if one wishes to label stuff, but one doesn't need to, but to understand stuff it can be a help.   It may be more detailed but that is enough for me for now and that is all my soul knowledge covers. 

----------------------------------------

===================================

[note from 7-25]  I had deleted some older channeling since I was going through a depression period and purging some stuff or whatever it was.  This morning I got the idea I could copy and paste them to the end of the regular posts of the same day.  Simplest way to put the older posts in.

==========================================


 11:15 AM

 I think a full soul being is what some are, but not all. I think in many areas one can make a body, manifest one if they are in an area of physicality. There is an area, or area, dimension or something of non physicality. The default appearance of souls are a point of consciousness with a ball of what looks like color around it.

Most prefer to be, at least partially, in the physicality areas. Some, or many, areas one can just manifest a body for themselves from the local stuff. Just poof, I think. & unicorns are not incarnations. if one is an incarnation say then they'd have a lifespan likely, the length would be based on perhaps technology, or healing rejuvenating abilities perhaps too. But also on the density of the place. So I feel 4th density beings have a longer lifespan then say 3rd density beings like humans. 5th longer then 4th. Though at higher densities one can just keep renewing one's body so the distinction may be a bit of a blur since one could, at higher densities, I think, put your body into a trance, project most of yourself out, and go around like a regular soul, and return later.

Though in many areas one doesn't have to be an incarnation but can be a full ensouled being, and be thus immortal, or non aging. Also I think being an incarnation usually means a more linear existence.


Hard to put into words what I seem to know, also the fine details I don't recall yet.

being incarnated may have some different sensations for certain things like sex, maybe one may need to eat, and a full ensouled being may not need to, but could comsume light. though I'm not sure if higher densities above 3 need to eat or not.

--------------------

Neat, I've never known anyone to be a dolphin type being except for me

Friday, May 29, 2015

Friday [5-29]

I awoke this morning and felt tired as usual, like I had never slept.  I went back to sleep then awoke after 10 minutes or so.  Oddly what I seemed to have is gotten, though likely just a fantasy dream thing, was a past life where I was an adult woman of some group of beings who were bipedal and mostly covered in fur.  I lived apart from the group, as was the custom since I was a seer, prophet, mystic type.  I helped the others through a transition from either 3rd to 4th or maybe 2nd to 3rd.  They didn't develop technology, but instead developed their mental abilities instead of technology.  just putting it here in case it's not a dream thing.  I'm not sure myself.  Also supposedly I would channel Orin.  I highly doubt this is a past live since I can't channel and certainly not a high level being like Orin.

-----------------------------------------------------------

I'm still pissed at original soul for imprisoning me here.  I'm sure he's gloating where ever he is, either glad to be rid of me or gloating & enjoying my being imprisoned here, the asshole.  What a fucking asshole he is.  As well as the other stuff he did like removing the chips so I can't project anymore.  Never could channel,.  So claiming one of the chips was to help with communication was likely a lie, and if it wasn't a lie he removed it too just so i couldn't do real channeling and it would become a fake imaginary channeling, not real channeling.  the fucking asshole.  He is such an ass.  What a god damn fucking asshole he is.  That is the nicest way I can put it.

---------------------------------

I lay down for an hour but was unable to get any sleep.  I got up since I think an hour is long enough to lay down and not get any sleep.  I am unsure if I'll do any more of the awaken the light body courses since I feel the same now as I did 4 months ago.  This place is a hellworld and I'm stuck here imprisoned forever due to the karma rules here.  What an ass that original soul was for imprisoning me here, likely out of glee.  That ass.

I bet no one wants to be here, and like me their souls just imprisoned them here to be done with them like my original one did me. 

Looking over the free meditations I can't do the soul linking since I have no one to link with and linking with myself is pointless.  I'll try another one though I doubt I'll get anything. 

what a fucking hellworld this place is an what a fucking asshole for original soul to imprison me here.  Wish there were laws against that, but obviously there are not.  I really hate him as much as I do hate being here.

--------------------------------------------

I tried the receiving and radiating divine love free meditation.  Didn't listen to all of it since most of it is bullshit.  There are no angels, they don't exist.  Angels of love don't exist since angels don't exist.  There are no such a thing as radiant ones.  There are no teachers of love, I have no connection to anyone, no relationships with anyone.  I don't see that I'll do this meditation a 2nd time.  Glad I didn't pay for it.  it's a total gyp, calling on beings that don't exist.  and people don't have connections with each other, some like me have no relationship with anyone.    only the first few minutes worked, feeling and receiving your soul's love.  the rest of the meditation is all bullshit, for the reasons I said previous.   How I hate being in this hellworld.

-----------------------------------------------

I tried the a new chapter in your life.  I can't say if it did anything or not since for the whole mediation I was either at the medium meditative trance, or I was unconscious.  I kept going back and forth between the 2 states.  No idea why, nor if it did anything or not.

I'm also not sure if I want to spend the money to get parts 5 then 6 of the awaken the light body and if it's doing anything for me.  Since their expensive, from my point of view and I'm not sure if I'm getting anything out of it or if its been benefiting me at all over the past 4 months.

---------------------------------------

I ran the energies before doing the violet flame meditation and it went very well, much better then earlier when I tried it and was left tired before I could finish it.

The violet flame meditation went well.  Though I know and don't believe in any ascended masters, not having seen any evidence for any.  I instead choose the ultraviolet colored soul I saw a few times 10 or 20 years ago when I could project.  No idea if it would count as one, but I'd guess being ultra violet he'd be higher then me who am a very dark blue, almost black.  I also don't believe in this soul ray stuff.  But the violet flame is not dependent on that I'd guess.

I feel much the same as before, maybe a bit different, a bit lighter maybe.  My abdominal area had some strong cramps in it in a few spots.  but that is not anything new. It enjoys doing that for some reason.  I just put myself into the violet flame.

During that I seemed to have this physical body, my soul body (that looked like a ball that was a very dark blue of a shade that looks almost black), and a dolphin like body. Similar to an earth dolphin, but not an earth dolphin, hard to describe since I can't see it well enough to tell what the differences are, the colors it is I can't see, ect.   Never have been able to and likely never will be.   I'm sure my abdominal cramps will go away, they always have before. 

----------------------------------

I forgot to put in that the 2 times I ran the energies that when I was able to run the energy to the 6th light body center, at the center of the head, I could feel a horn like thing connected to that and protruding form my forhead, hard to describe.  

---------------------------------------

Thursday, May 28, 2015

Thursday [5-28]

Since I'm done with the 4th part of the awaken the light body I think for the rest of the time I have till I have enough saved up, Friday of next week, I'll do the free meditations. I think today through Sunday I'll do the longer free meditations and Monday through Thursday I'll do the short meditations.  I'll do all the ones in a category and count those as 1 meditation.  Though I'll do each short one, 2-3 minutes, then type up my experiences, do the next, type that up, ect till I'm done with the category.  The total time for 4 of the 5 categories is about 18 or so minutes I think.  So about the length of a normal light body meditation.  I think today and tomorrow I may do an extra 3rd mediation, both of the solar light ones since those to combined are about 8 minutes.  Then I can start part 5 of the awaken the light body course Friday of next week.

I still wish I could channel and get real information, but I guess I'm not high or developed enough to do that yet.  No idea what level I am or how developed I am, I do wish i could find out somehow.

---------------------------------------------------------------

I did the opening to your true identity meditation.  Unlike what Orin describes in the guided meditation there were no guides, nor any other beings, it was just me alone.  So since no one was there I imagined a box I would reach into get pull out a smaller box and each of these smaller boxes did have a sphere of light that I used first on my emotional body, the 2nd sphere I used on my mental body.  to transmute each to as high of a level as they could be transmuted to.  Then I did see the light of my divine self.  We couldn't talk since I'm not able to canon.  So instead I merged with it.  Both first in my emotional, then mental bodies.   Then my Light body, then my physical body.  Then the center of my true being, whatever that is, so a true permanent link could be formed, even though we can't communicate. 

Part of the time I looked like a dolphin, but with a coloring pattern similar to an orca, but instead or black and white my colors were blue based.  The black was an extremely dark blue that looked black if you glanced at it.  The white part was instead blue. 

The time I was teaching into a box, taking out a smaller box, and out of that taking out a small sphere of light, my hands and arms were not human, but I couldn't see them to well. 

---------------------------------------------------------

I had fun at the rpg group. I finished the book I was reading.  interestingly one of the folks in the book mentions a planet where there seems to be a planet with anthro dolphin or porpoise, that look like a mix between dolphin or porpoise and humans.  Interesting.  They said the planet is named Hasnib I think.  guess it would be in the 5th density since Treb is there and it was one of his species that mentioned that.  I find it interesting not only because I have some sort of a connection to dolphins, among other things.  But also some of my past lives that I've seen glimpses of have been of, not just dolphins and others, but also some sort of anthro dolphin.   I wonder if it was one of these.  And from the 5th density.  Hmm.  Wonder if I started to delve into my past lives if I could learn from that, since I can't channel.  In one of the awaken the light body courses that did deal with past lives instead of remembering it he and I were able to have a short conversation.  I may try to use some of the past life stuff I downloaded later to see if I can start recalling some past lives or between lives stuff.  Since i can't channel that may well be an alternative to learn, as well as the light body courses. 

For now I'll do a short rest, then do the meditation I did earlier, then take a nap.  Then I'll look into seeing about starting to delve into my past lives.  if that one is 5th density perhaps he can teach me some stuff. Time being non linear it should be theoretically possible. 

---------------------------------

I did the Opening To Your True Identity.  It seemed to go ok.  I went very deep and went unconscious for a minute or 2.  I'll assume some stuff was going on on a non conscious level.  I do feel better overall.  I wonder what happened.  I know something happened since I feel some stuff happened.  I imagined at first that my divine self was inside me shining like a star, it's energy and light effecting me.  Effecting my emotional, mental, light, soul, bodies, and perhaps physical too.

Then I imagined I was dissolved into my divine self and had all my separate elements, transmuted into the highest reflection, highest vibration that I could be transmuted into. 

-----------------------------------------------

I first tried a 1 hour guided hypnosis for the past live, but it didn't work.  I think part of the reason is because some of the suggestions I didn't like, as well as it being suggested the past live was on the earth. 

I tried a 2nd one that worked better.  I only got a brief thing since my right knee started to bother me like it had to much energy and I had to move it.  This did cause me to have to keep moving my right knee which kept me out of it.  it happens but usually it is my left knee, and I have no idea how to do anything about it but to stop the meditation and move my leg. 

I did get a short view.  I was an anthro dolphin looking type being and he was inside his home.  It looked high technological from the very brief view I got. Not sure of the color he was.  I did get the feeling he was a male.  I also got that he was also a very dark blue sphere.  No idea what was up with that.  maybe like I was seeing 2 bodies that he had.  I didn't get a good look at him due to my knee. He was differently an anthro dolphin.  That much I could see.

at least I did get something, though a brief.  Unlike with channeling, which I got only fake imaginary stuff.    Think I got something about the world was moving from 4th density to 5th density, I think.  It was very brief, an instant so I can't be sure of that.
-----------------------------------------------------

I want nothing to do with the asshole original soul.  What a fucking asshole, trapping me here forever.  Now I'm stick in this hellworld and in the fucking wheel of karma with no way out. What a god damn asshole.  To put my feelings about original soul as nicely as I can.  

Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Wedensday [4-27]

I awoke this morning feeling exhausted.  No idea why.  Lately that is not uncommon. 

I do still wish I knew who and what I am, how developed I am at the soul level and how I can help that along and help ensure this is my last incarnation.  Since really the very thought of incarnating has me feeling ick.  Like not only am I dead tired of incarnating, but the very idea is starting to disgust me really.  No idea why. 

Also no idea why I feel such a strong connection to orcas, dolphins, western & eastern dragons, reptilian nagas, unicorns and pegasii. Perhaps not all the same level of connection or attraction. and why do i feel this at all? 

Lots of things I wonder and no way to find out till after this .... incarnation is over, however long that is.  I do hope this is my last and I dont' live past my mid 50's, which i really don't want to, in fact i'd rather just go right no this second.

I also seem much more thirsty lately then before, again no idea why and no way for me to know any of this stuff. 

Who and what am I?  How developed is my soul?  Is there any way to ensure this is my last incarnation?  how long will I have to be in this incarnation & that I'll never incarnate again?  why do I feel an attraction/connection to the types of beings I mentioned before?  why have I been more thirsty lately and often wake up exhausted, or tired?  

-----------------------------------------------------

The very idea of incarnating I do find it a disgusting idea, one I really dislike for myself.  if others want to incarnate that should be their freedom to choose.  I find I personally really dislike it for myself and find the idea of me incarnating as disgusting, ick, sort of thing.  I still wonder what I've posted previous and have no way to find out that I can think of.

--------------------------------------------------

tried to take a nap.  didn't get to sleep so after an hour I just gave up.  felt some beings, likely nefarious ones, doing energy work on me the whole time, likely to ensure I am trapped in this hellworld.  I really do hate being here.   at least now I feel merely tired and not exhausted, so that is a plus.   hard to breath just through my nose so have to breath through my mouth since my nose membranes are swelled up for some reason.  I guess just cause they feel like it.   god this is a miserable hellworld.  these problems, eyes that don't really work to well, the entire world is to bright, to loud, bad vibes in many places, hard to breath at times.  No sane person would come here willingly.  I wonder who the torturer is who imprisoned everyone here is.  I REALLY HATE IT HERE, I REALLY DO.  and the all caps were done on purpose.

----------------------------------

started doing the last meditation of part 4. the bitch Orin didn't give enough time for me to run the energies when the asshole said she was going to.  that bitch is always in to much of a hurry.  I'll have to run the energies then listen to the audio when I'm done. what a fucking bitch.  You'd think a non incarnated being would no be in that much of a fucking hurry.  especially when the fucking god damn guided mediation is 38 minutes long. not like the bitch has to be in a hurry. 

Seriously, someone should sit her down, force her to listen to daben running the energies with a stop watch in hand and when Daben stops stop the stop watch then she'd know how much at minimum to give.   Again you'd think a non incarnate would not be in that much of a hurry.

I did run the energies but it took 15 minutes and was only barely successful.  One I started some beings, no idea who, started interfering, doing some energy work on me also, at the same time.  interfering, had to pause a lot to breath through my mouth quickly since for some reason, likely their doing, I really can't breath much even through my mouth while I was trying to run teh energies, but i did success despite their interference, whoever they where.  Though it was just berly.  also felt like i had a horn or something attached to my forehead, can still feel it to an extent, likely something they attached to help keep me imprisoned in this hellworld.  Likely forever incarnating.

-------------------

I did the last guided meditation of part 4.  I do emotionally an mentally feel better but I feel more tired then when i started it.  i did feel constant energy work, likely interference from some sort of nefarious beings to interfere.  I didn't see anything but the usual when I close my eyes, a dim sort of light in the background with billions of splotches and dots of light in front of that.  so maybe 2-3 layers of that, hard to describe. 
Didn't see any of the stuff Orin was describing, but at least once we got to the meditation proper she was in no hurry then.  I felt some faint energy stuff. nothing of the dna being activated, being filled with light, evolving, cells evolving. i didn't feel any of that nor my sub personalities being filled with light and being absorbed into my soul.  nothing of being connected through soul and going higher to soul all the way to source itself.  nothing of being connected to and joining higher mind that is source.  I didn't feel any of that. 

------------------------------------
I really do hate being here in this hellword prison.  why am I confined here against my will?  I do wonder that.
--------------------------

I do wish walk outs and walk ins were possible since I do want to be a walk out.  I really dislike being here & do not like it at all.  Whoever said we are here by our own free will is a big lier. I do NOT want to be here in this hellworld at all.  No idea why those people lie and say we are all here by our own free will when I know I'm NOT. 

What person in their right mind would come here?  I know I never would come  here to this hellworld.


Gods I hate being here.  With no way to get any real true information. 

I do wish there was some way to get information.

----------------------------------------------


More energy work being done on me, likely to help ensure I'm trapped and imprisoned here and can't get out.  besides draining off some energy likely too. i have been tired all day and am still tired.

---------------------------------------------------------------

I still feel exhausted.  Though I'll try to do the 12th meditation of part 4.  doubt it'll do any good consciously.  to bad it's not key for me to get out of this hellworld.  gods i do hate it here.

I won't be able comment much on what, if anything , happens since it is so long I find it hard to remember what happens during such a long guided meditation.  Since I'm so exhausted I think I'll try to listen to it while laying down instead of leaning back in my recliner chair.

I did the  12th guided meditation of part 4.  It went well. I forgot to run the energies but i can do that later.  I feel tired, not exhausted like when I started it.  I still didn't see anything really.  I didn't feel much during the meditation.  Overall I feel the same, except I'm tired instead of being exhausted.  I do wonder if It did do anything or not.

--------------------------------------------

Awoke from my nap.  First time I don't feel exhausted or very tired.  I feel slightly tired, best I've felt all day. 

As I lay down I felt some being appear and was overlapping with my upper body.  I didn't feel like it had any low vibes so I ignored it hoping it would just go away, though it didn't until some time after I went to sleep.  I did feel the usual energy work being done, my whole body more or less resonating, some like the abdominal area seemed to be resonating more, with energy streaming.  No idea what that was about or what was going on.  No way I can find anything out about what is going on so I'll just shrug and go on.

------------------

I was thinking as I lay down about some stuff I could think over and write down stuff on 2 subjects.  The first is what I wish were true about myself.

I'll be basic, no need to get to long with this.  I'll do stuff as they come up instead of any sort of order. 

For one I do wish I could really channel for real, and preferably a very high level being, or multiple beings like my monad group, or even higher then them.  I do wish I was a very evolved soul, ancient soul, very high level & I no longer need to incarnate and have not needed to incarnate in ages.  So that way I won't need to.  That this incarnation will end soon, or at the the latest in my mid 50's, and very very likely before.  That I could just be  walk out when I wish, even tonight, and just leave this place for good.

The place Michael newton talks about in his books were true.  and that place I use to be able to visit where beings/souls look like balls of color, were either my home or one of them.  The other I've detailed in a previous post, last night I think, so no need to put that here.  that at the soul level i was a, in no real order of preference: dolphin (not of earth origin), reptilian naga, orca (not of earth origin), western & eastern dragon, unicorn.  maybe pegasus,

that the awaken the light body course will get me to being a monad level being, and the other light body courses I am thinking of getting will help also in this and or to get me higher then being a monad level being.  (though really I'd much rater be a walk out and get out of this world forever, never incarnating anywhere).

---------------------------

The nest is what questions I'd get answers to if I had access to the truth.  This may take a while since I'll again do it as it comes to me, and I may add to this tonight.

How old my soul is?  Do I need to incarnate after this?  where is my true home?  Where will my home or homes be once this <censored> incarnation is over?  How long will this <censored< incarnation go on for?  how highly developed,evolved am I? am I close to being a monad level being?  if not or if so, how do i help myself to get to the highest level I can during the rest of this <censored> incarnation?  What sorts of stuff do I do once I'm back at my true soul home or homes?

-------------------------

Felt more resonating and energy work being done on me.  Likely be nefarious beings to ensure I am trapped in this hellworld.  I wish either this incarnation would end tonight or I could become a walk out now, or asap.   I do hate being here. and really hope whenever I am allowed out of this incarnation that this is my last incarnation anywhere and I never have to incarnate anywhere ever again.   Incarnating seems like a stupid idea to me. Who in their right minds would come here?  I hate being here.

------------------------------------------------ 

Tuesday, May 26, 2015

Tuesday [5-26]

Deleted previous post since I can't really channel and none of it is accurate & don't want to leave it here to accidenty mislead anyone.

---------------------------------------------------

This, the 11th guided mediation for part 4 of awaken the light body was about channeling.  And I got my monad/soul group type.  My monad and their energy. 

I don't recall all the questions or answers, but the general gest is trust myself, be my self, my true self.  the group are my monad group and some are individual souls, some are reflections, higher reflections, of myself.  They include like my the part of me that's not incarnated that I often call soul since it's a handy label, twin flame, my possible future self. My twin ray is not yet included in this.  I may meet her during this incarnation, but perhaps after it is over.  I got the feeling she is incarnated or may be, but either not on the earth or not where we'd meet physically.  I'll meet or encounter her at some point when I'm ready along my growth and evolving. I guess when I've embodied a certain percent of my monad and have gotten close, a certain percentage perhaps roughly, to embodying myself as a monad level being, yet also remaining an individual. 

I'm here and to embody myself, my true self, to become my true self is my goal.  Also found myself thinking of my mates, twin flame and others I don't remember consciously but I could feel are there.  Not here, but there as in my memory or I knew before coming here and will again when this incarnation is over.  

Felt some slight pain on my left lower side but asked and they did manage to dissolve it and replace it with a higher light. the pain was very minor.

Think I'll not do this guided meditation not listening to the audio as I usually do.  I may do an opening to channel meditation so I can get done with the 2nd pass of that audio course this week, then I can start the 2nd pass of the receiving clear guidance audio course.

--------------------------------------------
Since I can't channel at all and whoever and whatever I channel is totally inaccurate I Won't be doing the 11th guided meditation of part 4.  Instead I'll move onto the 12th and last meditation, but since it is the longest one yet, 38 minutes.  I won't do that one while listening to the audio before I eat.  I'll do it without listening to the audio first.  Then when I awaken from my nap if there's time I may do the audio.  If not I'll maybe do it with the non audio  But more likely if there isn't time I'll listen to part of it. 

This one is about imagine your past being rewritten so you were born a master with full awareness and no veil. Only if I were a real master, but since it is the 12th meditation I'll do it, even though I know I'm no master.  No idea how developed I was, but I know if I were a master I sure would not be incarnating here on earth, which feels like a kindergarten school.  Masters don't incarnate here, especially not with viels fully in place witwh the sort of life I had.  Anyway on to the meditation. 

-------------------------

Felt some energy work or something being done on me like usual.  NO idea who are what is doing it or why.  Don't feel like I really care anyway.  Not depressed or down, just don't care.  I stopped my meditation since after i did the reason for it I just stayed in that stage and rested.  I stopped it since my constant tinnitus ringing got pretty loud so couldn't remain relaxed anymore really.  Now to post this and delete the fake channeling from google+.  I don't want any fake channeled stuff up that may mislead someone,  Can't do anything about my channeled thread on Spiritual Forums since I'm not an admin, but oh well. 

===========================================

I feel better now that I have deleted all my fake channeled messages from my Google+.  No one one can be mislead by those fake channeled messages that I thought were real.

I do wonder at my level of development as a soul.  I'd guess not very high since I am incarnated here on this world.  So that is likely one big telling clue.  Another is I'm dead tired of incarnating.  I don't want to be here but back home, whatever home is like.  Though no idea how many hundreds or thousands of incarnations before I can return home and stay there, whatever home is like.

I'll continue doing the awaken the light body courses, and once I finish those.  I'll redo all the 6 parts.  then i'll move onto the light body courses that I have picked out.  That'll take over 2 years to get all the ones I picked out.  I do hope by the time this incarnation is over I can evolve far enough to be finished with incarnating. Not sure if I'll be finished with incarnating by the time this incarnation is finished but I do hope so.

-----------------------------

Seems I'm banned from that spiritual forums I use to go to.  Likely due to my having a channeling thread on there and not knowing that I am unable to really channel and I accidentally mislead some people and the admin banned me for that.  It's ok.  I do hope they deleted that thread so it doesn't accidentally mislead any body. Since I'm banned there I went ahead and deleted all the bookmarks to that site. No sense in keeping them.

-------------------------------

After the awaken the light body course is finished and the month after I go back over the 6 part course again.  I think I may get the intuition course. Not sure if I'll get that or the heart one.  I'll decide later, plenty of time after all, a few months.   I think I'd prefer to get the intuition, higher mind, blending with my divine self, first, then go for the heart, throat, crown ones next. Then the 2nd light body course.


No idea why Orin & Daben keep insisting we are all masters. I only wish I were a master.  if I were a master I'd not be here, that is for sure.
----------------------------------

Also I do wonder what would home be like if I could have whatever home I want to have, when I finish incarnating and no longer need to incarnate anymore.  A great time it'll be indeed when I finish incarnating.

It would be a non physical place, or a place where those living there no longer need to incarnate ever.  Also have it be non physical, but ones can have forms if they want, or if non physicality is not allowed that is ok.

The inhabitants would be dolphins, orcas, unicorns, pegasus (why not), nagas, eastern and western dragons.  I'd have a home bigger on the inside then the outside and the inside would be huge.  Larger then a castle or mansion, maybe the size of a small moon or larger. Also no one will need to eat.  Especially none of the sentient races eating each other. And I can be alone as much as I need or want to be and no one will mind.  Same thing with each of the other sentients who live there.

Also everyone would be immortal and open about sex, why not.  it's only fantasy not what my home is like, so why not imagine it.  No idea what my home will be like.  But I do hope it's great, or at least comfortable.

--------------------------------------------


I do wonder how many incarnations I have to do before I'm fully finished & how long this one will go on for.  If I could wish it I'd wish that both this incarnation is my last and I won't live past the mid 50's.  not since I'm depressed, but I feel I don't want to live past that age and I diffidently don't want to incarnate anymore and diffidently don't want to be here.  Though as a kid soul I likely have hundreds or thousands ahead of me.  Yuk.

-----------------------------

I do wonder if I have a home other then incarnating here and what it's like. I hope its like I said in an earlier post.  or like that place Michael Newton said and I use to visit  before I ever heard of Michael Newton.  That I had been visiting since I was 17 back 30 years ago.  No idea where it is or what it is.  it's where everyone looks like balls of colored light.  Wish I knew where and what that was.  Can't go there since i can't project anymore. 

-------------------------------
I wonder if I'll be more developed and what I'll be like once I've finished the awaken the light body course and have gone over the whole course. 

I also wonder how developed and what I'll be like a year from now in June 2016.  I'd have long since finished the awaken the light body course, the intuition, higher mind, blending with my divine self, ceremonies of initiation (heart, throat, crown) and I'd have started the 2nd light body course.  I can only guess.  But I'll find out a year from now in July of 2016.  I do hope I'm more developed then now.  Maybe even an old soul how has earned the right to never incarnate again.  Maybe even earn the right to return home for good forever.  I'll have to wait and see and hope.

----------------------------------

I am having fun with the Tuesday livestream.  Been going on for about an hour now.

-----------------------------------


I do feel an attraction or connection, not sure which, for dolphins, orcas, western & eastern dragons, reptilian nagas (not the half human ones), Unicorns. 

Also I think pegasi,

I wonder why I feel a connection or attraction for them.  Maybe I'll find out one day.  also feels, now and then, like I have a horn, I can faintly feel at times that comes from my forehead.

------------------------

I wonder if I'll have a body of some sort once I'm done with incarnations. However far in the future that'll be. Or will I be a ball of light of some color.  Unless those experiences were lies too. 

----------------------------

I feel an inner connection to some like dolphins, orcas, unicorns, I do think eastern and western dragons, and perhaps reptilian nagas too.  Perhaps pegasus too?  and others maybe, but less so.  Not sure. I do wonder why, if there is a reason. 

--------------------------------

Again I do hope this incarnation ends in my mid 50's at the latest and that it's my last incarnation.  if home is better then here. 

I can only go with the light body courses since I've no idea what else may be lies and what may not be.  Not that all the Orin & Daben stuff works since I bought and tried their Lucid dreaming guided meditation and it did nothing at all. So at least 3 of their stuff doesn't work. The lucid dreaming is just a single 20, or so, minute course that I think cost $7, so not to much.  Much more worthless and useless was the opening to channel and receiving clear guidance since what I thought i was getting  was channeling the part of me not incarnated here, twin flame, future possible self, 1 then a 2nd mate , a unicorn and pegasus, the unicorn's family, or at least her parents.  and had 1 encounter with 2 of her brothers and younger sister.  Likely all lies, as well as the so called monad soul group that I'm working on embodying since stupidly that is the next level of my development since I had reached the soul level.  I knew I was soul, but me and the non incarnated part of me are the same being.  so supposedly since I realized that and that supposedly means I've reached soul level or embodied my soul being or merged or something, I wasn't clear on that, but supposedly I didn't need to consciously understand it.   I thought that the channeling was way to easy for me.  That as cause it wasn't real channeling.  I wasn't really channeling the part of me not incarnated, nor any of the other higher beings.

yea sure.  if I was at the stage where I had soul realization, realizing my soul and I were one or whatever.  and was working on the next stage of monad realization, becoming 1 with my monad, merging with my monad or whatever it means.  yea sure.  if i was that high I would not be here incarnating.  I'd be back home, whatever home is.  I wonder how many incarnations I have to go through before I'm allowed to stop incarnating.  yea, like I could get to soul realization, or whatever it was, that quick, in a period of 5 months, 4 months after I start the Awaken The Light Body Course, sure.

I wish I were that far along.  That would be cool.  not as cool as being a master, certainly not as cool as whatever comes after being a master.  But one day maybe.

--------------------------

I've already said what I'd like home to be like.   Though I think I may not mind if home was where everyone is balls of colored light around points of consciousness.  or if I could have more then 1 home.  That could be cool. 

As would being a starseed on my first & last mission here. 

---------------

I think once I finish the 2nd pass of the 4th part of awaken the light body, I think I'll go through and do the long free guided meditations form the Orin & Daben web site.  Those are meditations that are at least 15 minutes long. 

Then if I have time left, I'll do the longer ones at say 1 a day twice a day.  If I have time left I'll go through the short meditations and do several of those.  I'll do 2-3. Doing 1, type up my experience.  do the next ect, till I do around 3.  I wonder what I'll get from doing those free meditations again.  Some I never have done. So by Wednesday evening of next week I'll have done all the free meditations that Orin & Daben website has, long and short ones.  Neat. 

------------------

I did the 12th meditation for part 4 of the awaken the light body again.  it's one where you visualize being born a master with the veil never coming down on you ever.  I did that, and added in that i was working on becoming a monad level being and most folks were helping to teach me.  Except for a few that were here just as friends to have run with, and a few friends were maybe teaching me very minorly.  and I came here to get up to being a monad level being, and then go past that.   

after I stopped doing the meditation, which I stopped since I reached the modern day.  after a bit I did feel like i was floating.  no idea what it means. I can somewhat feel that floating feeling still.  Still no idea what it means nor any way to find out.   

I know no one's reading this, but that is ok.  I just do this blog so i can help organize my thoughts , feelings, and experiences and by doing so I may realize something or remember something I may normally have forgotten.  So it's ok that no one reads this.  if some do, that would be great. 

Monday, May 25, 2015

Monday [5-25]

I did the 10th meditation for part 4 and running the energies went well.  Basically it was about the aura and bringing in different energy into your aura.  I found the feel of my aura did change, but also it expanded in size as well.  It started say about 3-4 inches and wound up around a foot or so. 

----------------

I was also thinking of some of the stuff I either read of what Treb said, and on one of the density classes that Rob, who channels Treb, had, some of which are free on youtube.  No idea what the non free you have to pay goes into.  But it doesn't feel fully correct.  Some souls may do as Treb says, and rob says Treb says.  Start off as incarnating as 1st density beings, 2nd density which I think he says minerals are, the move onto animals, simpler animals, then up to more complicated animals then onto humans.  Then being a planet, then a star.  Forgot if he mentions them moving on to being a galaxy and or universe. 

it feels like some souls may do this, but not all do this.  Some souls never incarnate ever.  Some may incarnate for a while, only as sentient species.  Some may do just 1 or a few species and some may do as a bunch of sentient species.  Eventually some do grow tired of incarnating and stop, but others may incarnate for good. 

------------------

I'm not sure if planets and stars are a different line or type of incarnating then incarnating as a sentient is.  It could be, but what may blurr the issue is the fact there is freedom of will, so a soul could choose to sample different things. 

-----------------

Being a channeled being I wonder if that mean they can or can't bring some energy into the planetary grid, or is it only while they are being channeled they can do that.  It may also be a reverse where they can talk to the planet directly so can bring energy to the planet, and bring energy to the inhabitants only while they are being channeled.  It my also be just a different thing as well.

-------------------

For those nostalgic I'm sure one could manifest, say a section of the earth and some could play there, as if it were the earth.  Though if one were to lower the density down to 3rd density I doubt many would really want to play there or go there.  Maybe if it's left at the same density.  That may be the key.  Not the same as being incarnated on this or that world one had incarnated on, but one can create such a place for others to play on and I'm sure some souls do.  Even monad and higher levels I think may indulge in this, though not all will. 

& just cause one is a monad, soul, or higher then monad level doesn't mean one will never incarnate again.  I'm sure there are some monad level beings who do still incarnate, and many who do not.

-----------------------------

I did the 10th light body meditation without listening to the audio and running the energies went very well, as did putting the energy from the running the energies into my Renawre cocoon and aura. And like before my aura did feel like it expanded. Not much else to write about.

The forum seems to be working now, it was messing up before.

I do wonder if I have one or more then 1 thing I do back at my home or homes. I'd guess likely several things I do since the thing is about doing what you like & want to do and & excites you the most. So it's like instead of a job, one has various hobbies & pastimes and not really 1 or more jobs. That feels like a more positive way to look at it.

----------------------------------------

Deleted previous post since I can't really channel and none of it is accurate & don't want to leave it here to accidenty mislead anyone.

===================================

[note from 7-25]  I had deleted some older channeling since I was going through a depression period and purging some stuff or whatever it was.  This morning I got the idea I could copy and paste them to the end of the regular posts of the same day.  Simplest way to put the older posts in.

==========================================


11:06 AM

 Decided to, after reading some stuff Scarlett said in her yourspace. I had some questions and decided to get some answers.

So, i wasn't incarnated before I came here? <no, the previous incarnation before your present one died of natural causes at a great age. To your question of what he did, he did something along the lines of what Duane Packer and Sanya Roman, as well as those who channel Bashar, Treb and others do. you weren't one of the first but did come along later and do courses and some lectures. it was a world where there are, and were at the time, what some would cal bipdal dolphin type beings. earth isn't the only place with what one could call dolphin and dolphin type beings. most of your past incarnations have been on worlds in similar positions to where earth is at the present stage, going through a shift and helping with that by being a conduit for higher energy into the local grid and in those more of a visible public figure who did help teach others. Unlike now where you are more of the quiet non public type since you are winding down on doing that on that side and in the most probable futures have you, at most, doing more of the Bashar, Orin, Daben, Seth, and Treb type of thing where you will be the one channeled, if you do decide to do that. Those are the most probable futures. As well as others like Spitifire deciding she may want to have twins, when the time comes for her when she starts feeling and deciding she may want to have her first child soon. Though that is the future since she and Maribelle, like you, do want to not rush into that. And literally with an eternity, you can wait a few centuries or millennia or 2 before doing that. Having your first children that is, with each.>

So unicorns are not incarnations, or pegasus? <no indeed, they are full soul beings. Not incarnated vehicles like humans are. it can get confusing since there are some like the Pleiades, Sirius, and other races that are or were physical and incarnations with a lifespan and such, but also there are some that are full soul beings and not incarnated. Then there are some areas where you can manifest as a soul being. So you could manifest there, say when say this incarnation is over, and walk around there as if you were incarnated there. Some areas do offer the freedom of both. Being an incarnated being and traveling or living there, or just what you call teleporting there and manifesting there a sort of physical body. Which would be a body in all respects. Some areas like earth that's not really done, not as of yet, or its not really supposed to be done. besides its so dense it's difficult to even attempt to do that there.>

So if unicorns are full soul beings and not incarnations, then I was made at the soul level or recreated? <indeed, though as we said before we adjusted the quantum fields. No need to use exact terminology, humans are not ready for that sort of technology so we won't describe the exact methods, but also reached back as part of that so you could say we created an alternate timeline where those were your incarnations. so both happened. it may seem like a paradox but at the soul level it's not a paradox. it was indeed you who Maribelle and Spitfire have been with before this incarnation, not the previous you. and it was not casually done, but done since you did want this, so we reached back to do that and the adjustments.>

Wasn't that hard for you to do? <not especially difficult you would see us as monad level beings, to use earth terminology and we had some help from higher up then we are, and some of your soul parents, like your unicorn mother and dragoness are, humans would classify them as monad level beings, as they understand such things, which is true in and of itself. Soul's soul can be classified also as that, but a younger monad being, so to speak, instead of a very experienced one like your unicorn mother and dragoness mother, parents at the soul level. She is an elder of the unicorns for a reason. So you are as full a unicorn as you are a .... what you call a dolphin type being, orca type being. your dragoness soul mother, and to keep things what you would call balanced, you had 2 mothers and 2 fathers. Though souls do not have genders officially, many do have preferences. your dragoness soul mother, one of 2, is more then just 1 type of dragon, she has been what humans would classify as eastern, western, naga, and other types, and yes in some classifications nagas can be classified as a type of dragon species. That's why you couldn't tell exactly what type of dragon your soul heritage is since it is a mixed dragon heritage. Your other 2 soul parents you know and from then you did get what you'd call orca and dolphin type being soul heritages. So you are quite a mixed being at the soul level. Though with souls you are not 20% unicorn, you are full 100% unicorn, but also 100% various types of dragons, dolphin and orca type beings. also the dragoness who is one of your soul parents is one of the soul parents of one of your soul parents, as you felt and knew before.>

What is with all the energy I feel streaming into me when I lay down or recline the chair back to relax? <That is us, what you'd classify as monad level beings, of the same monad and your soul group, doing some energy work, streaming some energy that has beneficial effects on you, helping you to embody yourself as a monad level and soon you'll embody yourself as a full member of this monad, as a monad level being, which is where you are headed towards. Also Maribelle, and at times Spitfire, do help in this also. They are excited to do so. Your twin flame does at times also, and yes since you have realized yourself as soul, a soul being, and are well along embodying that, the intensity has faded a great deal, which is the normal level of being where you are at present. You have reached that stage & are heading to the next stage. All will proceed at a pace comfortable for you & not to fast.>

So I'll still be a pod member and a unicorn, not just a soul? <some beings are souls and still their species, unicorns and pod members among them, and you'll not be the only monad level being who's also a pod member and a unicorn also. That grove will just have 1 more monad level being as a member. The pod is use to having monad level beings as members. Though some of the younger members are shy when around them. >

Grove? <this is the are overlapping where the unicorns, pegasus and currently the gryphons, and some other species live. and yes you are known to them and by the time this incarnation ends, due to your level of development and evolution and growth, will be more known once you get back, and due to word of your reputation since some, like certain pod members, unicorns, and others do look in on you from time to time, as well as some other areas of earth, though many have no real interest in earth, at least at present.>

So the dragon part of me is mixed, how many different types, here I felt like the one talking switched. <the heritage i gave you as a dragon is 3 types, what some would classify as western, eastern and naga. Though some, or much, of what humans say about nagas is not accurate. their natural forms are not half human & half snake. Though as soul beings they can look like that. their original forms were full reptilian and half snake and half reptilian. Though they were, or many nagas were, as sentient beings some choose other ways, chose to be of the light instead of giving into darker desires. working closely with what humans would call eastern dragons, some of with do live where the pod lives, nearby areas actually. Some nagas do live on that same world.>

Can a world support all those species? <indeed, it is different densities, but travel between the densities is not difficult and for some it's as easy as changing from this hat or shirt to that one. And the theory of an expanding world does fit where the pod is. it can and happily does, adjust to the population size, it being a co creation thing, the planet and those living there co creating the extra mass, where needed. the world is a high level of being indeed. The, what you'd call singing in the background is the world doing that in certain areas, that the pod has set up as healing areas where they use the native crystals to enhance their own healing practices as well as the world assisting as well. many do travel there for their healing. and the pod and world are not parts of the federation or whatever you want to call it, but are officially neutral, but are allies of the various light organizations, and there are more then 1 light organization. and the pod are indeed like certain Pleiades in their sharing, many races are. Though some feel that way about mathematics, or other things, singing, there is much variety.>

Think I'll stop now since I do want to do some web surfing and such. <it's been fun, feel free to channel at any time and it is a good idea you have to pause to pull our energy into your body energy systems> I felt like that one shifted from the dragoness to whoever does most of the speaking. it feels like the work together but through 1 person who does the speaking to me. Maybe the most skilled at being channeled or something. I did feel some of the pressure of excess energy in the top of my head, but can easily deal with it.

Sunday, May 24, 2015

Sunday [5-24]

Not sure if part of this was a false awakening dream or happened fully while I was fully awake, so I'll paste it here, and I already typed it up and posted it in my dream diary thread.

--------------

This one could have been maybe a false awakening or not, not sure. I either awoke, or was going through a false awakening, again not sure. But my energy felt different, sorta like it was fuzzy or buzzing. hard to describe. Also I heard like someone stomping around the apartment as I was laying on my back with my eyes closed. Every time the person took a step there was like a bell or a buzz, not sure. Sounded like they then stomped into the bathroom and slammed the door.

I wasn't afraid, more like annoyed a bit. I then mentally asked for my mates, guides, soul (the part of me not incarnated in this body) future possible me, twin flame and added in any colleagues, friends, lovers I consciously don't know, and though I have never seen or experienced any angels or arch angels decided to add that in as well. Again I wasn't afraid just asked them to come check out what was going on, deal with it and any energy work needed doing.

After a bit i needed to go do something. I do keep a plug in light lit, it is not to bright but enough so I can see. I don't keep it plugged in since while I can let my eyes adapt to the dark, it is pretty dark in this apartment and I have bumped into stuff so thought why not have this light plugged in when I sleep. i usually keep it off, switching it on when I get out of bed, but at times I forget and leave it on all night. it's not very bright, but is enough so it can dimly light up a part of my apartment so I wont' bump into anything.

anyway I did feel my 2 mates and others pop in. Maribelle said she'd look into what happened. After a bit I needed to get up and do something but felt uneasy about going past the bathroom door. Something about the feel of the energy there felt odd, unpleasant or wrong. hard to describe. After I got done what I needed to do i want back to bed and when I woke up and went past the bathroom door it felt normal again. so I guess someone or multiple someones did whatever energy work was needed in there. again no idea what happened & if that was a false awakening, concerning the stomping and whatever it was or if I was really awake. I stayed on my back with my eyes closed not cause I was afraid, but a bit annoyed and trying to get back to sleep.

-------------------------------------

I awoke and felt exhausted still.  I stayed in bed for, maybe 20 minutes at least, not sure.  maybe I dozed off again and still felt exhausted.  I got an idea and thought why not try to see if I can get some of the energy of my monad and divine self and see if that'll help.  I did that, first I mentally did it, streaming their energy into my body and energy systems.  After a short bit I asked if they wanted to do this since i thought they may be better then I was and they said they would rather I did it.  it felt like I plugged myself in, and could feel their energy streaming into my body and energy systems.  I did this for a minute maybe, maybe more or less. It did feel like it helped.  I felt a little tired and not exhausted.  I felt even better 15-20 minutes later as I type this.   not quite sure what I did or why it helped but it did. Maybe going to the grocery store this morning tired me out more then I thought it did. 

-----------

I did the 9th meditation of part 4, it was about running a finer gridwork and it went very well.  Part of running the energies I wanted to see if I could include the energy from my monad, soul group, and divine self, and it felt like it went very well.  Felt like also that Maribelle & Spitfire were both sort of here at my sides.  The meditation switched over to Orin and she/he had a possible future self appear, talk to it briefly and incorporate some of it's energy and it's gridwork so mine now would become as fien as it's is.  Then she had me do it again.  The first time I had the intention of a year from now and the future me said things went well.  There were some minor hardships, but those happen living here, but the light body stuff went very well, better then he suspected at my time and I was able to get ahead, farther then I thought I would be able to get ahead in purchasing the courses.  Then for the other future me I went farther, after I had gotten all the light body courses and that me said all the light body stuff went very well, even better then expected.  his gridwork was very fine indeed, and I did incorporate some of his energy into mine and I'd guess other subconscious stuff.  It was to help make things even easier, more fun, ect, and that is great.

------------------------

Had a thought while I was in the shower.  If I'm an anchor for the higher light here, what if I'm the same back at the home or homes & places I stay and hang out at. 

It could be similar to earth.  Some folks like me like to advance and evolve as much as I can.  We enjoy doing that.  The majority prefer to evolve and advance at a certain even pace.  But those of us who enjoy shooting ahead and growing, advancing and evolving as much as we can can act like anchors for the higher light for others.  Just being around the others helps then go grow, perhaps more smoothly, more fun, depending on the culture and what's going on and the personal choice.

Some I share with, may grow a bit faster, depending on how much I share with them and how often.  If some of them share with others it effects them in a similar manner.  And so on.  There could be some around not as highly developed as I am, some that are around the same level I am, more or less, and some that are farther along. 

All those I am with and hang out with are helped in a similar manner to the way I help some here.  Though there they are far more aware of things, like the unicorns, pegasus, pod, and others.  So through doing the stuff I enjoy, like evolving, growing and advancing and growing as much as I can, and being around others and with others, having fun, sharing pleasure, our being, energy, love, what some would call sex, having fun, ect I help others as well by being an anchor.

That could be a clue to what I may do back at my homes and areas I hang out at.  maybe one of the reasons that maybe someone asked me to come here, original soul, or however that works. 

Though with the way the monad group folks said, the quantum fiends being adjusted, I think they said, when I was re-created, I got the feeling and or maybe they said, that it as me, this me, that was lovers with Maribelle, Spitfire, and others, and had those post lives that the original me had as an extension of original soul.  Though original soul and original me did that too.  Though the feel I get is for souls this isn't a paradox, just parallel selves or they created new timelines or soul lines or something.  hard to put into English what I mean. 

-------------------------------

Saturday, May 23, 2015

Saturday [5-23]

I lay down to take a nap but couldn't get to sleep, though I feel a bit mentally tired still.  I did have a conversation with them with them giving me some mental images.

They showed me, not very clear or sharp, images of apparently the inside of my home.  Saying that Maribelle and Spitfire had combined theirs with mine, a tradition among unicorns and pegasus.  Though it's more of an overlapping type of merging since they don't want to give up their personal areas or rooms nor expect me to give up mine.  My home can have, and has, 2 main entrances 1 to the pod area and 1 to the unicorn area.  I asked if it's possible even though those are different densities and they said sure it's possible. There's also been another entrance added, to the pegasus area.  They said it is immense inside, a mansion, with some areas that look like a castle, from the inside and a modest sorta house on the outside.  There are various exits.  one they mentioned leads to my twin flame's home, which will merge with mine when we merge and unmerge when we unmerge. that makes sense. 

They also mentioned I could have an entrance or teleport pad to their level, the monad level or density if I wish to use that term, or I could have a tardis in my home somewhere, walk into that and use the console to go to the monad level.  I think I'd find that neat to do that.

They said my presence and inner light will effect and has affected others around me, even there.  Just my being around folks will do that.  Even when this incarnation is over.  Also it's effected those I share with more, and sharing they meant not just slight energy mingling, but also what some would call sex. Like it's effected Maribelle and my various lovers more then casually since we've shared energies and its' started to effect Spitfire more, but less so currently, but some have started to notice a bit.  But many are not aware of the real reason and may likely put it off to her having a mate helping her to be a bit more confident, sexier in appearance, more attractive.  or the like. 

They then went into a bit not so g rated.  Saying that mares do gather to talk including about their stallion mates & lovers. I did get the feel that pegasus are monogamous, or most are, not sure if all are or not, though I guess being sentient there likely may be some exceptions.  They also said the fact I'm hung would spread.  I was a bit embarrassed by this, but only slightly.  Then I asked by what standards and they said unicorn and pegasus and somewhat by most pod standards, but what I call dolphin like beings and orca like beings.  Some gryphons may want to check me out once they hear more. (I'm going to assume they were kidding about that).  They mentioned I could change to a pegasus stallion if I want, my form being pliable, and that would really get Spitfire turned on, but over the long term she would prefer my more normal forms, those more native to me and my heritage.


Then they said some gryphons live in the areas near and overlapping the pegasus and with them.  They are more recent arrivals.  The area being deep in the light territory and with unicorns and Pegasus there they know it'll be a safe place to move into, and the pod doesn't mind.  So i guess that means both areas, pod and unicorn/pegasus are multiple species areas.  I asked if the gryphons and pegasus get along and they said they do, there are some hippogryphs also.  I guess a way to say they have some kids together or a few did. 

They said that homes could have doors that lead to other homes, like close friends, lovers, and the like.  If one has children their own bedroom and playroom can grow over time into their own home, that can split off from that of the parents or have a connecting hallway.  Though I guess they can just go and manifest their own house if the want too.

I watched a Dolores Cannon video last night about the afterlife thing.  I asked how accurate is that for me and they said due to my level of development and mission I'd bypass all that to go home.  I'm not native to the area and my native level isn't at that level anymore. 

The group of gryphons are those who left the fae are Long ago and wanted a place to live in peace.  The pod wouldn't allow any fae near the area, considering how the fae are in their own lands, as chaotic as humans in many areas and ways.

=======================================

I did the 8th mediation & running the energies went well.  This was about abundance as energy and I focused on abundance of money and spiritual growth, figuring 2 types of abundance would be ok to focus on.

I also had a bit of a conversation at the same time.  I asked about the belief that fae could turn non fae into fae and how would this affect the gryphons and others.  They said that even if one does give into that belief system those gryphons have been away from the fae lands far to long.  This group is an offshoot of the earlier original group.  They parted over differences of opinion, but agreed to disagree when they parted.  The original group believes they should remain isolated, based on their experiences in the fae lands and this group thinks they should incorporate more into the sentient beings community, that have nothing to do with fae.

Also I am indeed incorporating merging with their energies and mine, a monad divine self level of merging and I'll be fully merged with them eventually, at my right time, and will remain an individual as well.

also earlier, was a bit to embarrassed, and also forgot to type it up here.  I decided to try masturbating till I got to etheric instead of physical orgasm and it worked again.  This time I decided to see if I could include Spitfire into it and she seemed willing.  Maribelle I did ask but she suggested Spitfire and said she was doing something.  She didn't say what.  I assume out for a run, swimming, reading, or any number of things she could be doing.  Or off helping some folks.  I feel as satisfied, or close to it, as with a physical orgasm.  but none of the aftereffects of a physical orgasm.

Forgot to also mention, during the conversation they mentioned my being horny compared to others was some part of the rep that would be known to some, but those who heard of it know me and would think it would be odd if I wasn't due to being also a dolphin/orca like being and a pod member. Not sure about that. They could be kidding again, or half serious and half not. i just put it here since I try to put my experiences and thoughts on here since it helps me and maybe others. and by typing it up here I often notice or realize stuff I missed during the experience or think it over and realize something later. or get a poof later on related to it.

======================================


I was thinking while I was in the shower and later while I was laying down to take a nap. Are sentient and animal souls 2 different types or just souls that choose, I'll just be cats, and another, I think I'd prefer sentients, and stick to it? Or are they different types of souls.  Also if earth has a spirit or soul, I would assume its a type of incarnation.  So if stars have spirits or souls also, could planets and stars be another type of soul?  or be on another level of being then some sentient souls and animal souls are operating on another level?

not that the details really matter, just a fun thing to think about and ponder.  And the knowledge that one day I'll know, even if I have to wait till I'm back home.

--------------------

I was watching a Picarto stream and could feel love coming into me, or a sense of being loved.  I decided to explore this and could feel it coming from multiple sources.  both my mates that I know of.  No idea if I have other mates that I don't know of.  Their love did feel pretty strong, twin flame as well, soul (feels a bit different), I felt others along the same lines as my mates, some were quite intense, both my mates and twin flame I think were among the most intense.  Also multiple sources from the pod and others.  Also the monad/oversoul, divine self, or whatever the label is, but their love felt a bit different, maybe slightly fainter?  Maybe due to their vibration, density they reside at, or something along those lines.  Maybe a different type of love, or a combination of factors?

It makes sense that my mates and others, maybe loves or other mates maybe, love me in a certain way.  Twin flame may love me in a similar way to mates, but also soul.  Soul would in a different way, and soul is just the non incarnated part of me, since not all of me is in this body. 

The pod, at least those how know me or know of me, would likely love me in another way, maybe 2 other ways.  That makes sense, and the other friends and such I may have, colleagues, ect, may in a similar manner but different.  The guides, oversoul,monad, divine self, or whatever the labels are, would perhaps love me in another manner, plus their vibration may be higher then the others.  maybe that is why it feels a bit fainter, and since I'm incorporating or merging witih them, their energy, growing or expanding to their level.  So it could be as I continue their love, feel wont' feel so faint but will feel stronger since that'll be my native level.  or one of my native levels.  I would as them for tips but I'm sure they'd say to continue like I'm doing so I'll do that.  I'm sure they'd say if I should do something different.  and I'll continue to do this since it is fun and feels easy.  So why not continue on the fun and easy path. 


Forgot to put in, that I did attempt and succeeded in taking the energy from the love I was feeling and put some of it into my light body heart center then the rest of my body.  For a brief time only.  I did, and do, feel more uplifted, higher, uplifted mood, hard to describe. 

-------------------------------------

Once I'm fully integrated, expanded, grown, or whatever to the monad, divine self, or whatever it's called.  I'll be native to that density, but will likely still live in a few, or more then a few places and densities.  the place where souls look like spheres of color. that may be outside physicality.  the pod area, where my mates and lovers are.  likely close friends, and friends, or I may just visit them at times.  Not like I have to quite seeing someone just cause I move up. it's all about what do i want to do, what excites me and what do I really want to do, not what I have to do.  & it is the same for everyone else too.

-----------------------------------

I think I feel an inner excitement. Not sure if it external to myself or another part of myself, like the part not incarnated that I usually call soul.  i use that term since it is shorter & faster then to keep saying, the part of me not incarnated who's not twin flame whose also not incarnated. 

===================================

[note from 7-25]  I had deleted some older channeling since I was going through a depression period and purging some stuff or whatever it was.  This morning I got the idea I could copy and paste them to the end of the regular posts of the same day.  Simplest way to put the older posts in.

==========================================


11:58 AM

 Decided to try a short channeling this morning.

----------------------------------------

So are you guys monad level? <we are as we explained, but one can say the reflection of what you call your divine self could be considered a monad. Some humans use labels for the same thing and sometimes the same label for different things.>

Why is it it's easy to pull your energy into my body like I've tried a few times? <we're the same group, more or less, the same immediate group and a step up some would say but that is inaccurate. You're being recreated you are at our level, but we went into that in a previous post. So our energy is compatible, ours and yours we mean by our. So when you pull it into your own energy systems there is no problem. Though we do need to step down our energy, taking into consideration you're in a human body. if you were not you could channel our energy in-diffidently if you needed, since you'd be at our level. So you'd not need to channel.>

So I'm merging at the monad divine self level? <more or less yes. slowly at first. The light body courses are helping with that, even though you are not taking that course yet. You're ahead of the majority who take the courses since you're operating at a higher level then even you suspect. one of the reasons you were an excellent being to go and do what you are doing. A side effect of this makes you more attractive to some beings like unicorns and pegasi. Especially one particular pegasus and unicorn, but others also.>

Any other beings? <Some others and individuals as well that you have not yet met consciously yet. The pod are more or less use to dealing with beings at our (your and our) level since they have some at our level as members, you included. Some are more use to it then others, since there are pod members at all levels of age and awareness/development. >

& the unicorn and pegasus herds? <they live more or less together in an area near where the pod lives at, but not the same density. Though travel to and from is more or less easy or not to difficult. Travel between the 2 groups and where the pod lives at and those who also live with or near the pod at the same density. the exact dimension doesn't really matter since most don't bother with those details. The pegasus and unicorns live more or less in what could be considered overlapping areas. With some who may be living there, having come in later. You'll discover the details either when you are back on this side, or over time as you incorporate/merge, or whatever term you wish to use, more of yourself as you are currently doing.>