I did the 9th guided meditation for the 5th part of awaken the light body. Overall it as a somewhat meh meditation. running the energies at first felt not very good but then I realized I was pulling in a very fine type of energy I could barely feel. Guess that is an improvement
The rest of it was about going back and forth from the Fullonia and the Sa Ha. I don't see the reason Daben was doing that. I didn't see the point. But I did it anyway and also I kept my 3 mates and Nagi in my intention to share with them this energy, and our love also. Then after I bit I thought to share the energy and have the intent to channel some of the energy into the earth grid, in addition to having her in my intent as one of my mates and Nagi in the ones I was doing a light sharing with. then later on still I kept my intent on also including the place where the Thursday rpg group meets, and then briefly a few of them in the intent while I was running some of the energy between the Fullonia & Sa Ha. Overall a meh meditation. Though doing some light sharing with my 3 mates & Nagi did feel like that part went well, as well as the other folks and location and the earth grid I focused on keeping in my intent in running the energy. Daben also said for me to open my eyes a few times towards the end of the meditation. I did but I didn't see anything different. I may be able to feel and know stuff, but I don't have any visual soul senses when I'm here in this body.
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It seems with sharing , the pod type sharing, there are maybe different mechanisms. Based on my experiences.
By this I mean say if I try to share with say Gaia, without masturbating. it is a more constant thing instead of building to a peak. Though it feels very faint if if i initiate it. If like Gaia does, which she has done, it is much more, full normal intensity. Though it does feel like Gaia is holding back and not doing as much sharing as she could. I guess since if she did she'd blow a fuze or circuits in my energy body or physical body.
Also while I do masturbate while focused on sharing I can feel it more strongly then when I try to just share without masturbating. I'd guess masturbating must add in another mechanism. Though I can still feel that my senses are very dulled. I would guess that is part of what Gaia means by that the fun will really start once I'm no longer incarnated here. Since being mates and lovers we'll of course share often or regularly, and then we can do it with full force, so to speak. She'll likely not need to hold back. I would guess Nagi, Maribelle, & Spitfire have been holding back also. They may just know I can't take the full force of sharing.
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Also concerning Gaia, I guess it's not odd that a soul incarnated as a planet can find an individual soul like me sexually attractive, and more then just sexually attractive. From what I recall we had an immediate connection and feelings of deep love for each other that did include sexual feelings (to put the feelings into English terms) From what I recall it was like an instant knowing that we would be comparable lovers and mates and a desire to share affection, love, pleasure, our being, right off, from what I recall. Since as I typed up before, I do recall i went to meet Gaia before I'd incarnated here. Though also original soul incarnated me without my conscious knowledge. that is a bit of a conflict. I guess due to the 2 timelines being both valid. the 2nd one being me as an independent soul. Not sure when I split off form original soul. Maybe that is a blurred area since when I was recreated what they meant by the quantum resonance thing they mentioned were adjusted it could be time was altered. Guess they can create a new timeline. I didn't think that was possible.
I wonder if my relationship with my mates and Nagi will change any once I'm no longer incarnated. I don't mean I have any fear of it not lasting. I just mean if the dynamics will change. I also wonder what Gaia's helping me to reach her level, what her guiding and teaching will entail. She did say it would be fun and easy. i guess part of it may be me merging with her for periods of time to experience what it's like, and also our sharing may take on some added dynamics rather then just us sharing our love, affection, pleasure and being. Though I still doubt I'd want to do any incarnating, as a planet, star, or individual being. Feels like this new me doesn't really have an interest in that.
I also guess my sharing with the pod, my mates, Nagi, and any lovers I may have will be more intense and such since I'll be able to fully feel and experience it.
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