Sunday, June 14, 2015

Sunday [6-14]

I did the 9th meditation for part 5.  It went like before, sorta meh.  Running the energies went fantastically,though like usual the saHa didn't respond to much.  This time the Fullonia seemed less responsive. it may be because I'm not fully awake and  should take a nap, as well a being just one of those things that those may be not as responsive at some times as at other times.   I also think it may be normal for certain light body energy centers and light body centers to be less responsive then others.   I didn't really feel the power and such of the Saha as Daben said.  Felt like both barely responded.  But that's ok, maybe they are just not as responsive in me as the average is.  and once more when Daben had me open my eyes, again everything looked exactly the same as it normally does, no idea what he expects those who do this guided meditation to see. 

I also could feel all 3 of my mates are here.  Maribelle & spitfire on either side of Gaia also present, in part since she is incarnated as the earth, but also her energy all around me as well as my other 2 mates.  not sure if Gaia is present in a female dolphin form with my two mare mates.  it does give the feel of the area a very high energy feel, very high resonance.  It's a great feeling.  I can feel us sharing our love for each other, mine for them and theirs for me, and us for each other as well.  A great feeling and hard to describe it.  I do hope to experience it often, if not continuously.  That may be the natural way of things, to feel such all the time, or the normal way to feel anyway.

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I did the 9th guided meditation for part 5 of awaken the light body.  Not long till I start the 2nd pass.  I'll start the 6th part on day 1 rather then 5 since it has 14 rather then 12 meditations, and since when I've finished the 2nd pass of part 6 I'll start immediately on redoing all the awaken the light body course, all 6 parts again.

Running the energies went well.  Though it felt like of my 3 mates, it felt like Maribelle or Spitfire was here, not both of them at once.  They may swap out.  Not sure how long it'll be like this but I do like having one of them here along with Gaia.  I wonder if Nagi pops in. I'd guess she may make herself easier for me to feel since she has said she doesn't like the low density of earth and doesn't really go there.  She has mentioned that is why she's more aware of our being 1 then I am.  it is partially based on what density she is at, and I guess if she's also focused on doing other things I may be less aware of her for that reason also.

The main part of the meditation was switching between the Fullonia and SaHa.  The Saha felt the least responsive.  Maybe because they are new to being active, or maybe just one of those things.  I may have certain LB energy centers and LB centers that are less responsive then others.

Overall I'd say an average to good meditation. 

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I've been thinking about a few things.  The relationship between me and twin flame has changed.  Maybe like I've moved past that.  Not that she & I don't get along. It's like since I know twin flame, the part of me not incarnated and me are all the same soul, just I'm the part incarnated, and she's the part that we were sorta experiencing the illusion of being separated, or there were things I had to learn, raise to, maybe clear, before I grew into knowing that soul and I were the same being.  I knew that intellectually before, but then the time came when I experienced that, knew it really and experienced it.  Though like with Nagi I'm less aware of it then they are, likely due to many things in me are dulled down. 

Twin Flame and I scarcely talk, like Soul and I don't.  Maybe since we are the same being and know it, not much reason for us to talk often.  Though once I'm over there I'd guess we'd get together at times to just hang out, and share, but maybe not as much as with our separate lovers & mates.  I do wonder if Nagi and I will get together much or not. 

it does feel like though the part of me not incarnated, me,  and Twin flame are the same being, Nagi is/was my other half that I was split from but recently was ready to re-merge with.  Not sure if I understand it, but that is ok.  I dont need to undrstand the full details.

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Ps: forgot to mention.  During the latter part of the guided meditaion, Daben had me feel of my energy then mental body and they do indeed feel lighter, more relaxed, more clear. 

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I did some masturbating, including my 3 mates, Maribelle, Spitfire & Gaia, as well as Nagi and myself all in it.  didn't get to an energetic orgasm, but it did feel that we were all equally sharing, especially Nagi, but I also felt they would strongly prefer if I was with them so we could share in the sense of doing it in a sex type fashion instead of sharing energy, love, ect like we do now.  They do strongly prefer and want me to be physically with them.  Since they do prefer to experience sharing while doing what some would call sex.

It may also be that my being incarnated dulls things so if we were on the same density and I was not incarnated we could REALLY experience sharing, unlike this which feels like, at least for me, I'm only experiencing the taste of sharing, but not full sharing since being in this physical body dulls things down.

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one experiment that i think I'll repeat is I was doing sone Qi Gong and go the idea and I modified some simple movements with the mental affirmation, intent and mental visualization of bringing in more of my true self, pushing aside my fears, worry, ect, illusions and bring in more of my true self, lift up my illusionary self to be transmuted, it's resonance raised and pull down my true self.  A bit vague but I did feel it work.  Towards the end I started to feel hot and it felt like, hard to describe, like i was getting some joy, energy that was higher resonance that was giving me joy, pleasure.  Hard to describe.  I think I may experiment again to try to experiment and get it down to what is more efficient and do that. 

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think I may get 1 or 2 Dolores Cannon books next.  As I've said in watching some of her youtube videos she appeared in I could feel maybe she had some distortions. and I think when I asked I was told there is some.  I think they said it comes in in the way she asks some questions and some of the conclusions she draws. But that is ok, if there is some, it means there is some truth and information there.  I'm sure I can use my intuition to figure out which is which.  Michael newton has less, but I think that is because he tightly focuses on 1 area, life between life and incarnating on earth.  He cuts out the rest of the stuff.  Like it really doesn't matter if someone is an indigo this or that, or they had all their past lives on this or these worlds.  He leaves in some mention of there are other worlds, not sure if other dimensions or realms are hinted at, but he just focuses tightly on the areas I said.  So that may be why there is less distortions.   Not that I'm putting Dolores Cannon down.  I'm sure she did the best she did and how knows how many people she helped by what she did, including books, the videos she was in.  Millions I'd bet.

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It seems when I do masturbate and include to many, my 3 mates, Nagi and myself, it may be spreading to thin, that or maybe I'm not developed or something with being here makes it less efficient to be spread that thin.  Though I think I'll do that sometimes, sometimes less then all those folks, and at times just 1 & one other.  Though I don't go to a full physical orgasm usually.  just an energy one.  It does feel beneficial for all of us involved.  Though with just me and 1 other it's like I can feel my own and the other person more.  Maybe due to being here dulling things so I'm not as aware as I normally would be. Or maybe some other mechanic.  Another advantage of energy only orgasm is I can do it many times a day, a physical one may use more energy or something so I have to wait quite a few hours before I can again, not sure how many but that is ok. 


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I did the 10th guided meditation for part 5 of awaken the light body and running the energies went very well.  It felt like i was using both a higher type energy and some of Gaia's energy as well as I was running the energies.  I got a sorta mental message as I realized this that Gaia said something like <we're mates & lovers, of course I don't mind you using some of my energy and it is only fitting> or something of that general message. 

As before the experience of the Fullonia & various light body energy centers did go well.  Running the energy I noticed that the 6th was less responsive, like the SaHa.  but that is ok.  with the 6th it is easy to accidentally put a bit to much energy there.  So maybe it has less of a capacity or it's more sensitive then I think. 

and as before when Daben mentioned it I could feel my emotional and mental bodies do feel lighter, more clear, ect.  hard to describe. more relaxed. 

Also towards the end I got a brief conversation from Gaia, Ill try to recreate it below.

<Planets are members of their own soul groups you know> And as she said this I could feel mentally we were in some non human anthro forms and she was giving me a sensual hug from behind, her chest & belly against my back.  for a second at most, not enough to get an idea of what these forms felt or looked like apart from they were anthro or bipedal.

"They are?" I asked, not having thought of that before.  <mmhmm.>

I then wondered who else was in Gaia's soul group and maybe if it could be like the world where the pod is, or others maybe.  <I promise you'll know first hand.> Gaia said as he did the same type of hug from before. 

"you mean when I'm up at your level?"  <mmhmm.>  Gaia answered again and the same feel of sensual, not really sex, though I can still feel that mixed in with the love, but the intent was to be more sensual this time I felt.

So i guess I'll understand the planet soul soul group thing as I get closer to her level.  and as I was thinking this I got from Gaia <Oh yes, you'll be a full conscious member of our group.> with the feel of her smiling and the same mental sensual feeling again.  That sounds like an interesting experience, and I do wonder that that is like.  A soul group where some are incarnated as planets, with the Gaia saying <and some as stars, though not all of us incarnate dear.> with the same sensual feeling, strong like before.  interesting.

I guess it's soul groups within soul groups, within soul groups.  maybe at multi level.  <yes, dear, that is a very rough approximation but close enough to do for now.>  she said again with the sensual feelings not quite as strong, likely since she knows I'd like to post this and eat.  Though in the back of my mind I can feel her strong sensual feelings towards me, with true soul love and behind that sexual feelings, like I can also feel Maribelle, Spitfire's feelings for me and me for the 3 of them.  Nagi is another category since she is me and I am her, though I'm not as aware of it as she is it seems.  But that is ok. 

Ps: a bit more from Gaia, <yes the 2 of us do have strong passions, as souls we don't hide that and accept it.  As your 2 other mates have as strong passions as well.>

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