Friday  1-16

So, if it is not safe for the shadow part of me or soul part of me to merge or integrate to fast, what would happen if the process was done in say a second or 2?

"You would experience a moment of ecstasy that you have not experienced yet and like won't till you are here.  Once the moment of ecstasy passed you'd find yourself on this side of things.  Pleasurable but not why I incarnated as you.  There'll be enough time for such pleasures when you are here."   Another one I"ll not post on sf, to embarrassed.   "you did ask."

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Saw a picture of a raptor type of dinosaur this morning on the mailing list I"m a member of.  It did stir something, or was it a connection?   I looked at pictures of dolphins and felt the same.  was the dolphins one stronger or the same?  Not sure.

Also did a bit of an experimentation.   Think I've done it before.  Was watching a bit of the most recent Matt video and did feel some sort of waves.  I paused the video several times and the current wave would continue with 1 other after that but then no more.  When I started the video again it would start up again.   Wonder if something is going on or I'm imaging it.  Hmm.

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Hmm, can I speed up the merging with shadow self and me?  Seems I could a bit.  I focused on that, felt a pleasure and the pleasure grew to an orgasm that lasted the ? 5 ? seconds or however long I tried it.  Also felt the ? waves ? or whatever from listening to the Matt video at the same time.  ? were these happening on 2 different dimensions or layers?  Is that why I felt both at the same time?  Is this part of what it's like to be a multi dimensional being ?

Why the focus, thoughts of sensual pleasure ? sex between soul parts?  "its natural for us, do not focus on it, accept it since it is natural for us.  It'll be more fun.  accept as natural self.  it is for us here."   are all souls like this?  hmm "not all, only some."  ok, i'll just accept it, that it's normal for me, "good, more fun can begin."  I look forward to what was meant by that last remark.  hmm.  :)

? am I the soul aspect's first incarnation on earth, or first human on earth?

"some think of us as sexual hedonists.  They have their ways and we have ours."    Others as in other souls, over souls?  "oh yes.  But you'll find you like our ways since you are us, one of us.  They are natural us so accept, enjoy."

Is that like a come on, pass or something?  "certainly, and more. lesson, accept.  why would i not feel this way and come on or make a pass as humans say since it's to another me.  accept, learn.  more fun and process will continue smoothly, easy, certainly more fun."    uh, ok, sure.  "seductive, like that thought."

"you are one of us, one of me.  accept.   you know, feel you like our ways since they are your ways. Natural normal for us."   more seduction?  hmm, I do like it and some of the sensations. "why not be seductive to use human term, you're another me and i'm another you."  Yea, i'll accept it like I have above and not think or be embarrassed, "accept, embarrassment will fade from accepted way that is natural for us, our way. as embarrassment fades more will fill the empty space.  and more fun for all of us.  if you think this is being seductive and a come on, wait till you are here among us fully.  ;)  "

The feel I have, or the knowing is the bit about as embarrassment fades more will fill the empty space, whoever that was did not mean more embarrassment will fill the space but it was purposely leaving out what would be filling it maybe as a surprise, or I'd figure it out myself, or another would say.

Getting a bit long. Soon I may start a 2nd Friday blog.

Tried to have one of those poof, clair(?) things and it came easy.  The sensual hedonist way (to use human labels) is the normal way for the soul I'm part of and the soul group (?family?) it is part of and ? oversoul? and hence it is  the normal natural way for me as well and that I would accept it fully, whether it was soon or later.  I also saw as part of that poof that there are other ways, more logical less emotional, and other ways that perhaps I either wasn't ready to know yet, may not be able to understand or would just distract with to much information.

I never suspected any of this, especially the sensual hedonist way is the normal way for me the soul I'm part of, soul group/family ect.  Though if I do think and feel of it, it does feel totally normal, correct, the normal way for me, though others have their way.  

I also decided to try something Matt mentioned in a video.  When I do feel embarrassed by this I'll mentally do a "yay I feel embarrassment at this." and see what happens.

Felt what would be a type of hug from I guess soul.  Like it's chest and abdominal was pressed to my back, and it had it's arms wrapped around me and my chest.  Kundalini was resonating in response felt like. I also felt some of an orgasm pleasure type sensation from this experience as well.  With my 2nd chakra responding strongly during this experience, then my 3rd one started to respond strongly as well

Had an interesting thought before or just as I started playing Matt's 3rd most recent video.  Don't look for the truth, let the truth look for you.

Though each individual may have their own truth.  There is no truth more important then another, no reason one can't discuss our own truths.  As long as ego can be left out of it and we're not saying, no that is wrong, this is what the real truth is.

Since I decided to accept this i wonder if the seduction and come on, or whatever the proper terms is/are will stop but I feel a sort if, "oh no, it's just starting, the real fun and pleasure can get started now."  the expression, (you ain't seen nothing yet) seems to pop into my head.

I have a curious idea with a bit of silliness mixed in.  Once I'm over there, and say a separate soul identity,  besides the fun I'd have with the soul I'm part of now and the soul family.  What would happen if I were to try a come on or something similar with the oversoul I'm part of?  if I do understand the concept correctly, or as correctly as I can now.  Or the oversoul that that oversoul is part of.

Watched most of Matt's to good to be true video.  Makes sense, & its fun to give oneself compliments for silly things.  I came up with a few:
"I've not punched any elephants today."
 "I've not kicked any tigers in the face today."
"I've not verbally insulted any rocks today."
"I'm sitting in this chair like a true grand master."
"I've not time traveled into the past to make it fit my will today."

Guess I can add to that, I enjoyed the come on and seduction the soul I'm part of , a member of the soul family, oversoul or whoever/whatever that was earlier today.   Though that I'll not put on sf.  
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The silly complimenting yourself is certainly fun, and I do feel great afterwards, when some of those don't make me laugh.