Tuesday  [2-10]


As for my higher self, I guess technically not. I have been in contact with dan and stan, and my twin flame. and also my current soul. Or if maybe i'm contacting a part of him or something. Or if a higher self will sorta happen or has happened but not fully implemented yet. Not sure of hte process. Not sure if that counts as enough contact, having main contact with 2 guides that are aspects of his, my twin flame and I can contact him.

Not sure of the dimension he's gone to. maybe up 1 dimension. they won't say what dimension where most of the pod is.

With my twin I think the key is she was an independent soul before this happened. Not sure if that makes sense. i asked her and all she said was, the key is she was an independent soul before any of this got started, and they did something, behind the scenes, to ensure that we would remain twin flames. and her energy/being, like mine, were once part of this current soul, when the original soul we were part of was an aspect of his before he choose to split off and become an independent soul. She also hinted at, I was asleep for part of this process so not consciously there. whatever that means.

As for the soul I was part of. i get the sorta feel/knowing that it would be harder for him to reach me since he went up a level or vibratory thing. he has to rest from his ascension and learn or relearn, grow use to it. Something like that. maybe he has to focus more fully on that for now. not sure if that makes any sense. time flows different from them then us.

i guess it's like I heard on a bashar video I listened to yesterday when a woman asked why her recently deceased husband isn't in contact with her. she said it's been 5 months. part of what bashar said, besides she may be trying to hard is. part of what bashar said, and i'm no idea who this bashar is, but i do like his style and the way his voice sounds, for some reason. he said, for you it has been 5 months. but he maybe has the full intention to console you and maintain contact with you, but for him when he turns around immediatly for him, for you it's, poof, been 5 months.

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 just a few mental questions to Stan while I was doing some morning stuff.

"SO, I guess what happened will mess up my being on the council at some point"

<no. I'm on some councils myself.> then he sort of does the equivalent of leaning in to whisper conspiratorially, i get the feel it's really meant in a non serious manner <it does add a certain bit of prestige to it.> I kinda do the equivalent of Spock raising an eyebrow, <since we're aspects of a higher dimensional being and can tap into his wisdom, it helps make some of the younger souls feel even more at ease.> and he smiles a bit, <and it give us an excellent reason to, fool around and have a bit of fun, with each other. After all since we are both aspects of the same soul, we do have to learn more of each other and make sure that we get along, and if we experience some pleasure at the same time, all the more reason.>  I've noticed instead of being just an anthro orca he's been holding a staff.  I pay attention to the staff, and he switches to looking like Gandalf for a moment, "yes, excellent movie trilogy, well the first 3, the 2nd 3 not so much, with the 3rd not as good as the 2nd, which isn't as good as the 1st.  Like the Shrek movies.>  he switches back to his anthro orca appearance.

"I've not seen the 2nd or 3rd hobbit movies.  I didn't know the pod knew much of earth culture."  <yes, when we heard about the earth mission some of us started looking into earth culture.  ancient Egypt, movies and cartoons/anime and certain books, games ect, are an especially interesting subject with some.  and you'd not believe the stories Tolkien, Lewis Carrol and others are and tell now. and that OS guy Doyle wasn't it?>  "Doyle was the one who did Sherlock Holmes.  Baum wrote the oz books."  <yes, anyway some of them are thrilled with the huge audience they have on this side and the new tools available to them on this side.  Though some of them have incarnated.>

<You're being a part of the same soul does allow us to have more knowledge of earth, since you have knowledge of earth.  We can tap into that knowledge or just know it.>

"hmm, sorta like I can somehow know, Dan is on a ...ship, near or around earth... either on another dimension, vibration away or slightly out of phase, same place but different, something so it or they are undetected at present?"  <see, you're learning how to tap into that same link, knowledge, but don't try to hard, it's natural and will be even easier for you over time as you become more aware and yes, it'll happen still, regardless, the mission still proceeds onward and you are on the fast track still, more then 1 now really, but the primary one will assist the collective unconscious as well.>


"so how is she still my twin flame?"  <certain... steps were taken to insure that.  the full explanation is a bit complicated, but part of the reason is the soul you're part of now she and you were once part of, not as aspects of an aspect since neither of you were active so to speak, had not been realized or existed, unlike say Chad and Sam (an aspect of myself I very recently merged or whatever the term is)  they are aspects of an aspect.  but the fact that both of your begins were once a part of him that you are an aspect of now.  Certain, aspects or parts of this you were present at but not conscious or agreed with us to not remember till later on.  Since that would complicate things and distract you.>  "yes, I guess it would."

"I guess this means we're, brothers?" <in a sense, we're aspects of the same soul.> and he hugs us close with his hands going a bit low on my back, <and an excellent reason to, have a bit of fun.  Though as soul said, think of it as sort of like we're members of a pod within a pod.>  "sounds like he has more then 3 aspects that are external, <certainly, but how many you'll find out later.>  "I guess he likes being male.  <he has incarnated as a number of genders and strongly prefers being male.  Some prefer that, others prefer being female, both genders, or flow back and forth based on their mood.  after all we are orcas & dolphins so not sharing, pleasure would be not our way, and it it fun.  and I can promise I'm not as kinky as Dan is.>   "yea, I guess, thanks."  Though I do feel a sexual arousal from his mental closeness, and a spiritual sort of sexual arousal as well, hard to describe.

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Forgot to add in this part I asked early on.  "Why do I feel I feel different at my core, ? energy ? but like the shell around that feels the same.  <the shell around it as you say is the you that you know as you and your real self that you are partially aware of, beneath the human conditioning and programming that you've been shedding and will continue to do so, wither you help the process along or not.  The core so to speak is sort of the connection you have with the soul we're aspects of, and a bit of soul itself.  it does feel a bit different since it is. >  and he adds in <of course you feel the sexual desire and urges and a soul/spirit level since we are dolphin/orca type beings, to use earth labels.>
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Had an interesting experience a short time ago. Forgot exactly how long ago it happened. While I was playing a game on my tablet I was also, somewhere else with Stan. Not the white buffer space but, maybe a private place somewhere. We were first on anthro orca forms and I hugged him close, opening my mouth to gently take his rostrum into my mouth, to which he said something like <yes, explore your dominance.> i felt during this as if my sex drive and urge had increased above the usual max. I then entered him with my maleness, taking his wrists into my hands on his back, not painfully but in a sort of hugging embrace. I switched wich of his wrists i was holding so I could cross my arms on his back and started to thrust into him. After a bit it felt like something started to rise from around the upper back or throat level, some bit of solid something with a spot of it that felt tingly. we then switched to non anthro orcas with me on the bottom and holding him in my flippers with my mouth still around his rostrum and still thrusting gently and slowly and whatever it was still rising, at this point near my upper neck . Stan for some reason said, <yes, yes> as if he felt what was happening to me and knew I was close to something. <experience your inner dominance.> he said, or something close to that. then it felt like whatever it was hit the top of my head and I felt a sort of, good feeling, pleasure maybe, my sex drive was well above the usual max. i also felt an extreme closeness, hard to describe, and also calmness, contentedness, maybe love and joy too. Stan caressed my sides and back saying something like <shhh, relax, experience it.> It passed then for some reason he said, <welcome.> "uh, thanks, but what for, you've already welcome me to <you've taken the first step in you as a new being. You may not be aware of it yet, but you will be soon.>

As I type this, do I feel a slight resonance going along the whole channel along my spine to the top of my head?  Feels like i do and some feeling along the top of my head stretching to the back of my head maybe?   maybe including the 3rd eye area too maybe?  maybe.

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Think I forgot to put this bit into Stan explaining how my twin flame and I are still twin flames.  I trying to remember the experience and type it down sometimes I get a bit ahead of myself and slip past something thinking I had already typed it down.

<even though the soul you were part of became an independent soul and your twin became an independent soul from it, the bonds are still there and can't be broken.  the lines or bonds so to speak, are still there.  hers to the soul we are a part of.  They are still there.  But in a different sort of state or stage then ours is to him. >  or something like that.

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I also wonder what I'll be doing say a year or several years from now. I've no idea myself & not sure what I'd like to do. Though it's likely way to early to be thinking of that, but I am curious. I did take a 10 minute walk outside, had an urge to walk outside for a while. I can say I do feel different, can't put my finger on how.

Also wonder what I'll be doing after this incarnation, but I'll be thinking of that then, after any needed recuperation. Attending any party, if there'll be one once I go home. Rest a bit, get shown around. Then at some point tell Soul my decision of if I want to be a separate soul or remain an external aspect. I also wonder if my twin flame and my relationship will change over time or not. I guess it will, but in what way, only time will tell. maybe one can have more then 1 twin flame? the label seems not to accurate, a base vague thing for what is really a soul thing. and like one can have more then one. Different feels to it?

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I was talking to my Twin Flame right before a masturbation, and wow can she be erotic.  She knows buttons to press I didn't know were there.  Though as i though of typing this she said, <if you think I'm erotic wait till you're here.  Then you'll see how erotic I can be.  A week will go by and you won't even know it.>  oooo, has me interested. 

But on to why I initiated talking to her.  I somehow knew how she remained my twin flame though I switched to being the aspect of what was my soul grand parent  She became an external aspect of the same soul I'm an external aspect of, before the incident last night where soul pulled me up and said to me it was time for me to make a decision and I accepted is offer.  She said in her case her becoming an external aspect of the same soul I am currently is a temporary thing.  <We both know it's a temporary thing in my case.  I'm to independent to remain an external aspect of his for to long.  but for you I can do it for a while.>  That makes sense how we are still twin flames.

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not sure if it is normal, my not having a higher self.  It's the soul i'm part of now, dan, stan, twin flame, and the green dolphin I call green sister that i don't talk to to much. 

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I asked the soul I'm an external aspect of now. "am I a new being?" newsoul said <yes. i became a new being twice. first time was when I became your soul, and 2nd when your kundalini rose earlier today. >

"so why did it rise during my sharing with Stan?  <why wouldn't it. you are both orcas or dolphins in reality.  So is the kundalini you have.  It's not really a human kundalini that you have.> 

"so i guess for you it was poof.  I'm still getting use to having a new soul. <no, not poof for me either. I'm getting use to it also, having a new aspect. >

"I guess you know all my memories?"  <not really.  though I can access all of your memories far more easily then you can mine.  Don't try for now. Just get use to the new you that you are. 

"So is this veil going to go away?"   <you'd be surprise how much of it is gone.  it is dissolving so to speak.> "if you wanted to remove all of it at once for good I'd not mind."  <I'll consider and think about that.  you just relax, get use to the new you. and you'll gradually slip into 5d before you know it.> 

"So those 2 experiences, is that what, sharing is like for souls who are where you are?"  <very Similar, it's what its like for an aspect and I who want to share with me or have what some call soul sex.  See i can easily access what you know of earth.  Though I don't go about prying into your personal memories.> 

"can we... do that again in the future?'  <sure, anytime you want.>  "just like that?"  <yes, just like that.  if you're surprised I'm that open, considering where i am, then consider, I am what some would call a cetacean or fin soul.>  "i don't want to personalty loose myself in that experience when this incarnation is over."  <and you won't.  You don't want to, and even if you do loose yourself in the experience i don't want you to.  You'll get use to that after a while.  you are still VERY new to that.  So don't worry.  I want you to remain an external aspect, not an aspect fully merged into me. and your twin flame doesn't want you to either.  >

"it is, different feeling like 7 different things at once, and it's so intense."  <good, shows how aware and how much growth you have, to be able to feel that many things at once when we share.  it just feels more intense, from where you are. once I incarnate you as a pod member you'll be more use to it.  and yes I can do that once you are here, but not right away. I'll let you rest, and such, till the right then when i ask if you want to continue our relationship or not, and it's not forever.  if you change your mind later you can go independent.  and if you don't like being independent you can always come back.> 

"so, if I do remain as an external aspect of yours, you won't incarnate me, like on earth or somewhere?  <my only plan really is to incarnate you as a pod member where Stan, your twin and others are at.> 

"Will I have to be born into wherever they are?" No, you could experience something like when you accepted my offer to become your new soul and you an external aspect of mine.  You'd feel something but not a huge thing.  or if you want to experience being inside an orca and being born i can arrange that, and the babyhood and growing up to being an adult. it's a rare thing but a few do like the experience.>  "nah, think I'll pass."  <consider it, lots of time to consider it.> "is that a kink of yours or something?"  He was giving me a mental image of being a baby orca type being feeding from a "mother".  <I do have kinks I like.  everyone has certain things they like. some things they may not know they'd like.  and no, I won't force any on you. Any you dislike you'll still dislike with me as your soul. any you had no feelings for or were neutral about, yu may find you like, or like to indulge in once in a while, or may dislike.>   "i'd rather do the poof thing." <that is ok, we'll discuss it again later, the advantages of each.  no need to decide now.> 

"what changes will I experience or feel with you as my new soul?  <some I'd rather you find out for yourself.  much of the you you know as you, the true you, won't be changed really.  maybe slightly, like looking through colored sunglasses.  some bits may be nudged in this or that direction.  being an external aspect of a soul higher up from where your former one is at will have some advantages.  Some I'd like you to discover for yourself.  Some are, you'll be on a sort of fast track, so to speak, as a soul.  Much of the changes you'll experience or get to know having a new soul will be more subtle, at least at first.  You'll find you like this new arrangement.  you really did make the absolute best choice for yourself.  any of those other choices would not have been anywhere as good.  as time passes,  you'll find there are many advantages to being an external aspect of mine.  as Stan said, you get the best of both.  You can do your own thing, grow, learn advance, and still have the advantages of being an aspect.  >   "like 2 of your aspects seem to want to share with me."  <that is just one of the fringe benefits. and they would have been willing even if you were an aspect of your former soul or an independent soul.  they wouldn't once the situation came to light since it may have influenced you and we wanted you to decide for yourself.  Though we did do strong hints what would be the best choice for you.> 

< but as to the changes of me being your new soul, me having a new aspect, and you being a new being twice.  We'll explore and learn that together, as well as exploring and learning certain things alone.  It'll come easy.>  "go with the flow, accept, and have fun."  <and pleasure.  Don't forget pleasure too.  and I'd never force you to do anything that you don't want to do.>