Friday, March 27, 2015

Friday [3-27]

Also got a bit more yesterday, no idea where from. I think it was connected to my wondering about the energy sheath thing to keep karma from sticking to those who have it, that Dolores Cannon talks about and my wondering, think it was Wednesday or Tuesday if I'd have to return here after this incarnation is over. and I heard the mental voice of something like <no you won't have to.> or something like that.

If I recall it, once this incarnation is over I'll come to a time when a decision has to be made if I'll return here willingly to incarnate, leave this world for good, or help from the other side of things like some do. I diffidently don't want to incarnate here again. a point will come after this incarnation when I'll have 3 choices, come back to incarnate again, help from the other side but not incarnating, or leaving entirely. I don't want to incarnate again. Incarnating here does have some fun aspects to it, but I don't want to incarnate here again. and I feel if I choose to help from the other side I'd be still tied here til the project is over. an inner part of me doesn't like that either, prefers freedom, so I may do the 3rd choice and just leave, so i can go where I wish without being tied to one area or spot for an entire project. not sure if that is me, 1 or more aspects, or some part like the unicorn in me, dragon, cetacean in me. I'll likely figure it out and likely it'll be multiple.

Former soul came here for the mission, but the thing is that was him, not this me typing it. I was an extension of him so not an individual till I incarnated here since he got me to agree to merge with him after a past incarnation instead of going fully independent with my twin flame since that would make certain aspects of this mission easier, though he either didn't know or purposely didn't share all the details since if he had I would not have come here. also I was re-created so both those are reasons I'll have, one day when this incarnation is over, a 3 way choice. I think it'll be after whatever recovery period after an incarnation here is over and a bit of time for me to experience being the soul or full me, since really I've never experienced the soul or the real me as me. Some time after this someone will come and I'll have to make 1 choice from the 3. Return to incarnate here to help the project along, help from the other side, or leave completely.

I get the feel certain mechanisms were in place so the existing karma system would not effect me as well as my taking some steps since I would come across the information (only recently started I think since I'm partially awake/aware) so it would not effect me. They took certain steps to doubly ensure it would not. Since the plan works best if we are not effected by the karma here.

some do see this earth thing as a failure since some adjustments have had to be made, others shrug and say everything needs to be adjusted from time to time. certain adjustments and interference from within had to be done since earth would have headed down a dark path indeed without outsiders coming in. Some (including current soul) had said back when the veil think, karma, being separated was a stupid thing and it would not work. Some of them are pointing that out, even as they come and are here to help.

I further feel that something doesn't want me to go once this incarnation is over, not sure who or what. But the original 3 choices of the original contract are still binding that original soul agreed to before I incarnated here. I get the feeling whoever or whatever it is has to give me the 3 choices, and if I choose choice 3, where I just leave never to return, they, or it, will offer me a 4th choice. maybe they want me to choose now but I refuse to and further say any choice made now is not binding and I tear up any such contract now. The 4th choice I think can't be offered to me right up front since there were only 3 choices in the original contract and they, including former soul, didn't see that I'd need to be re-created so never planned for that and the 4th choice is being formed and put together now. Including what they would say I'll be doing exactly and what the advantages, disadvantages, and I will demand full disclosure, all the information and time to think over a decision and talk to some others. Since with the original plan even if I choose choice 3 and left here original soul would still be here. But my needing to be re-created totally messes up the original plan I think.

I think the partially formed ideas are maybe i'd be away from home like an actor who does movies and appears in tv series. Like I'd be away from home for say months or weeks. Then I can go back and stay for a while, weeks or months. Maybe I could just teleport back and forth or maybe I'd need to use a vehicle to do so, that either would be made available to me whenever I ask, or one given or assigned to me for the duration of the mission. Though like an actor can, to an extent, I could bring along family and or friends maybe, few, so I'd not be as separated from them. Maybe I'd be allowed to keep it after the project is fully over. Maybe I'd have other incentives during the mission if I agree, and maybe other incentives after it's over?

some ideas I maybe would do would be, & I feel it's not formulated fully yet, but maybe going back to the 80's or something of this timeline to each some who are thinking of volunteering what it is like on earth, since I have first hand knowledge, so they'd be not surprised like the first wave, and then teaching or guiding those who do choose to come here after some of us tell them frankly what it's like on earth. To prepare them with more detailed information and or teaching. Maybe an alternate timeline I'd be on one of the councils there since some are feeling since this mission needed adjustments and retooling since they missed up since none of the council incarnated here to get first hand experience what it's like on earth. To explore in maybe an alternate timeline, what if we had that knowledge from the start and the first wave folks were better prepared. what if we had that first hand knowledge ourselves before we fully formed the plan and asked for volunteers to implement the plan. Which some are saying they should have incarnated here first themselves before formulating and asking for volunteers to implement the plan.

just a feel I get like someone or something doesn't want me to just go so they'll offer me this 4th choice. not sure if any of this is true, none of it, bits and pieces, or there is some distortion.

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I did the 9th meditation, you are the master - compassion.  Interesting.  for the 2 folks in it i picked ,1 to be a friend and the other someone i had some problems with online years ago.  i think it went very well.  think I may pick some one i had more recent problems with online-wise for the 2nd time I do this today, and maybe for the 2nd do a general everyone I've had problems with in the past.  it should be possible to do this instead of picking 1 at a time.

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Once I lay down I had the same thing again, love/pleasure along with resonating energy coursing through my body. No idea why it is happening but it dos feel great. I assume there is some purpose behind this even if whoever is doing it refused to talk. Felt like i went so deep in relaxation I lost consciousness for about 10 or 15 minutes, no idea what happened during that. I guess much the same with lessening effect. Towards the end it felt like this physical body could float, it felt so light.

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I did meditation 9 again. Went well, very well in fact. I got very relaxed. Felt like I went very deep indeed maybe. As i was coming out of the deep meditative state felt like this body stopped breathing and some part of me, and it did feel like me, but not this me. This me was focusing on following along with the guided meditation. It felt like me, but not this me, took a energy thing shaped sort of like a finger and did a sorta hard jab at a certain spot of the brain. don't recall the exact spot, but the body started to breath again.

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after effects of the meditation is I feel very relaxed very light. towards the end i did feel a bit like I could float. Towards the end of the laying down to take a nap or meditate i also felt very light also

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